My extensive rant on men, relationships, dating, biology, koalas and whatever

[TheSolitaryMan]

I think being a koala is simpler than being a human, period.

Ooh, I don't know about that. All that sleepy munching of eucalyptus leaves gives a lot of time for one to perform a nihilistic analysis of the pitfalls of sitting in a tree all day, eating plant matter

 

[tangerinedream]

I think being a koala is simpler than being a human, period.

Ooh, I don't know about that. All that sleepy munching of eucalyptus leaves gives a lot of time for one to perform a nihilistic analysis of the pitfalls of sitting in a tree all day, eating plant matter

The Koala as Philospher King? Never considered that. Hmm.

 

[Equinox]

Seriously, you guys! Yesterday I gave TWO guys on OkCupid 4 stars on their profiles. I KNOW that when someone give you 4 or 5 stars, you get a message from the website telling you, so they know I've rated them highly. This was YESTERDAY, and NONE of them has contacted me. Boooooh! This system is sooooo rigged! It's unfair that MEN get to just ignore you when you approach them, and yet they complain about being single. They have NO right!

Due to lack of koala and 50 emails from guys, I'll just drink this melted chocolate instead, and whine a bit more. I'm sure that will, in the long run, help with my issues and improve my chances to score with one of those shallow guys out there.

 

[Ak5]

Your right.

I never leave the house or talk to anyone, but when I do, all the girls ask me to unzip my pants. Its weird, cause I don't talk to them or look at them, they just come to me.

The only times I do go out, for the doctor's office for example... There was a massive traffic jam! All the girls were lined up from the highway to my community, and then to my home waiting for me!

It's good to be Male!

 

[Ghost Boy]

Wait Men always get women?... But I don't even have one girl? Does that mean I don't exist?... :'(

 

[Nitramici]

Wait Men always get women?... But I don't even have one girl? Does that mean I don't exist?... :'(

It means you're a koala. You'd know if you read the whole thread.

 

[Doubt The Rabbit]

Koalas are not bears.

 

[Ghost Boy]

Wait Men always get women?... But I don't even have one girl? Does that mean I don't exist?... :'(

It means you're a koala. You'd know if you read the whole thread.

So I'm a Koala... that doesn't exist?... *head explodes*

 

[TheSolitaryMan]

Wait Men always get women?... But I don't even have one girl? Does that mean I don't exist?... :'(

It means you're a koala. You'd know if you read the whole thread.

So I'm a Koala... that doesn't exist?... *head explodes*

This thread is really getting quite confusing.

On the plus side I suppose, you're viewed as really cute, cuddly and huggable by similarly non-existent girls

 

[Nitramici]

Wait Men always get women?... But I don't even have one girl? Does that mean I don't exist?... :'(

It means you're a koala. You'd know if you read the whole thread.

So I'm a Koala... that doesn't exist?... *head explodes*

Exactly. It's been shown earlier in this thread that koalas are made-up entities designed by evil, evil, evil men to lure women in.

As for why you aren't actually attracting women despite your cuddly koalaness, it's obvious :

They're on to our plans now. It won't work anymore. We need to come up with a new strategy.

 

[TheSolitaryMan]

Exactly. It's been shown earlier in this thread that koalas are made-up entities designed by evil, evil, evil men to lure women in.

As for why you aren't actually attracting women despite your cuddly koalaness, it's obvious :

They're on to our plans now. It won't work anymore. We need to come up with a new strategy.

Plan B: Pandas.

 

[Equinox]

All men are to blame for me being single despite my 4318 attempts to approach guys. You need to own up to your responsibility and start lowering your standards! Why on earth should you go for a woman who has the qualities you find attractive, when you could just settle for the first vajayjay you find?? There are BILLIONS of girls out there just WAITING for a man - any man - to approach us, and if you look past our endless whining and self pity and aggression and man hating, you'll see we're actually not so bad.

I've never had a boyfriend, and that's not from lack of trying (even though I never go out because I have no school, no job and no friends, so I don't actually MEET any people, but sometimes I will, you know, just open my window and shout to anyone on the street "I'M SINGLE! COME WOO ME!"). I have NEVER talked to a man who said he's never had a girlfriend (online doesn't count, for some reason), and if I ever DO meet a man who say this he's obviously lying because he doesn't want to acknowledge that I'm right and own up to his male responsibility! Any man, online or IRL, who argues this, is just doing so because I've struck a nerve, and they KNOW I'm right.

And I STILL haven't gotten any replies on my OkCupid approaches! Just because I'm not tall and blonde or a "bad girl". Naturally I have every right to blame the entire male gender for this. While I'm at it, I'm also going to blame the entire male gender for all the rain pouring down outside, for the sad fact that there is no chocholate left, for me falling on the ice last year and breaking my coccyx, and also for the hoover bag being full so that I now have to change it. I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to forgive them for the koalas.

 

[nerdygirl]

Yesterday, I left the house and actually smiled at this one guy, and he pretty much looked right through me. I glance behind, and what do I see? A younger girl with bouncier boobs. Men only like pretty girls with perky boobs. They never want me because my boobs are too big and I'm ancient. I'm already in my 30s. I'm going to die alone, aren't I?

I saw a stuffed Koala the other day and I wanted to set the whole store on fire.

 

[Code S.O.L]

I am Australian. This thread offends me. And so do koalas.

...

And Australians.

 

[nerdygirl]

Men never admit that it's hard for women in the dating scene. They always pick on women who say they're lonely and go, "Oh, gee. You have that slot between your legs. Just open it up to the public and yell, 'VEGAS BABY' and you'll never be lonesome again."

While I realize a lot of you don't realize it, meaningless sex actually DOES prevent you from being lonesome. You just have to have it so much that there isn't time to eat, sleep, go to the bathroom, shower, or... wait. Who am I kidding? It's not like we girls do anything else. We don't have lives. We don't just visit this site between classes or clients, right?

So, yea. Just have so much meaningless sex that you're too darned busy to realize that not one of those guys gives a **** about you. After all, it's pretty significant that it's easy for us to get that sort of thing. We should be grateful that guys are so willing to insert tab A into slot B that they'll do it into pretty much any slot B that comes along. In fact, I recommend opening up slot C and D while you're at it. Heck, take a few tab As at once. Then you'll REALLY be too busy to feel lonely.

But you know, even then it can be rough. I wore this hat to a club that had a little neon sign that said, "I'm AVAILABLE". Not even the homeless bum outside wanted me. The men kept doing that stupid thing where they look in my direction but they saw right through me to the pretty girl in the back who had already turned down five guys because she was married.

I hate the way men seem to feel so entitled to hunt women, but only the girls they're attracted to. I mean, we're expected to give out our contact info to any and all guys who approach us. So how come they only have to be attracted?

And the few times men do get turned down, they always say it's because the girl's a lesbian, or she's on her period. If we happen to say that a lot of men get nervous when the roles are switched, they act like we're the ones who are crazy. At least we aren't known for calling them homosexual or for saying they're just reacting to blue balls.

 

[tangerinedream]

I hate the way men seem to feel so entitled to hunt women, but only the girls they're attracted to. I mean, we're expected to give out our contact info to any and all guys who approach us. So how come they only have to be attracted?

And how those men don't view the fact that they look through 15 women to check out the "hawt babe" as 15 rejections.

Um, guys, that's exactly what you just did. By considering those 15 women beneath your consideration because they didn't fit your criteria, you rejected them. Tossing around the word attraction doesn't change the fact that you rejected 15 women based on a surface-level criterion.

I get how important attraction is. Hey, if a guy approaches me and he doesn't fit my own list of criteria, yeah, I'll probably reject him so as not to waste his time or mine. And really, there's nothing wrong with that, so why, then, is it goddamn evil and unfair when we women do it and it's just chalked up to attraction when men do it?

Oh yeah, stupid double standards again.


/koala-free post

---

And the few times men do get turned down, they always say it's because the girl's a lesbian, or she's on her period.

That's so clever. lol


Not

 

[Pheenix]

Nerdygirl, that pic was awesome.

 

[ladysigh]

What happened to the "other" thread? Seems to have disappeared...

 

[tangerinedream]

It was closed.

 

[firebird85]

It was closed. Dang censorship again.