My theory on why smart guys struggle with women

Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum

Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
Status
Not open for further replies.
Dissident said:
Yes but I mean that the people at the time weren't so much fighting back the system to get what they want as much as they were indoctrinated from youth to believe that such a thing was bad for society, at least in the south. Inside they may have felt the desire but would have denied it to themselves because of their raising. There were exceptions, yeah, but this was the general practice.

And it's actually still practiced. You wouldn't believe since moving even further down south, how much that taboo still exists. Especially amongst the older folks, and those who were raised strictly by their word and stayed true to that word. Even though a lot of them don't mind being around, or working with, people of other races, many of them stay within their race when it comes to marriage and having kids. I can tell some of Jeremy's family members look at me like I shouldn't be amongst them, and I've been told that his grandfather would not have liked me because I'm part black.

When I look at it like that, I'm just thankful I found someone who just doesn't give a honeysuckle about what other people say.
 
I actually find women of all races attractive. I'm half Native American, so I am interracial, although people are surprised when they hear (they assume there is something different about me, but they always classify me as white.) I've had crushes on white girls, African American girls, Asian girls, Indian girls, Mexican girls, etc. As long as you're my type (body type skinny to average, medium to tall height, pretty face, pretty eyes, pretty smile, good personality), that means you're someone I would pursue.

I get a lot of flack for being picky about not dating obese girls. Well, I'm not obese. Why should I have to date something I'm not? It's a turnoff to me.

The problem has always been that whenever there has been mutual attraction (as in I like her and she likes me back), something always has to come along to fresia it up. Either we never see each other again, or I get sick, or she moves, or I get really shy and she gets turned off, etc. Sometimes I think God hates me and doesn't want me to be happy with a girl, and as a Christian this makes me angry sometimes.
 
LeaningIntoTheMuse said:
As long as you're my type (body type skinny to average, medium to tall height, pretty face, pretty eyes, pretty smile, good personality), that means you're someone I would pursue.

I get a lot of flack for being picky about not dating obese girls. Well, I'm not obese. Why should I have to date something I'm not? It's a turnoff to me.

You have the right to be just as picky as you like. On the other side of the coin, you can't really say much when a woman doesn't choose you for whatever her reasons are either. Not saying that you do, because then that would a double standard of course. So, you mentioned earlier that you're bitter about being alone, but due to your personal preferences, I think it makes it much more difficult for you to find someone. Again, NOT saying you don't have the right to be picky if you like.....
 
Why should I not be picky?

What if I marry someone who I am repulsed by? Am I supposed to just stay married, even though I find her physically unattractive?
 
LeaningIntoTheMuse said:
Why should I not be picky?

What if I marry someone who I am repulsed by? Am I supposed to just stay married, even though I find her physically unattractive?

Why are you asking me those questions? Did I just not say that you do indeed have the right to be picky? I also didnt suggest that you marry someone you find repulsive. :p
 
You said it would be harder.

I assume that is because I am not that physically attractive. So therefore, you are judging me based on how unattractive I am, and how more attractive people would have better choices in dating...
 
LeaningIntoTheMuse said:
Why should I not be picky?

What if I marry someone who I am repulsed by? Am I supposed to just stay married, even though I find her physically unattractive?

Did you actually think about this before you posted it????
 
LeaningIntoTheMuse said:
You said it would be harder.

I assume that is because I am not that physically attractive. So therefore, you are judging me based on how unattractive I am, and how more attractive people would have better choices in dating...

I suggested that your OWN PERSONAL PREFERENCES concerning females would make it more difficult to find yourself a match. I never ONCE suggested it had ANYTHING to do with your personal appearance. You "assume" incorrectly. I didn't judge you AT ALL and I see nowhere that suggests I did in my post. I also never mentioned ANYTHING about "how more attractive people would have better choices in dating..."

You made assumptions based on NOTHING I said. Don't put word into my mouth - I CLEARLY said nothing of the sort!
 
I'd recommend actively working to improve yourself.

The short list:

1. Do something physical, so you like who you see in the mirror.
2. Do something intellectual, so that you can have more diverse interests.
3. Go to one new place every week and talk to one new person (2 minute conversation)

Step out of your comfort zone, and find out that it's not so scary.
 
jeffcallahan said:
I'd recommend actively working to improve yourself.

The short list:

1. Do something physical, so you like who you see in the mirror.
2. Do something intellectual, so that you can have more diverse interests.
3. Go to one new place every week and talk to one new person (2 minute conversation)

Step out of your comfort zone, and find out that it's not so scary.

I like the way this guy thinks...
 
LeaningIntoTheMuse said:
.... As long as you're my type (body type skinny to average, medium to tall height, pretty face, pretty eyes, pretty smile, good personality), that means you're someone I would pursue.


LeaningIntoTheMuse said:
... you are judging me based on how unattractive I am...
 
Minus said:
LeaningIntoTheMuse said:
.... As long as you're my type (body type skinny to average, medium to tall height, pretty face, pretty eyes, pretty smile, good personality), that means you're someone I would pursue.


LeaningIntoTheMuse said:
... you are judging me based on how unattractive I am...

+1
 
Please close the ******* motherfucking thread.

How nicely do I have to ask? I'm the OP! Close the **** thread!
 
They have to notice the request first. I don't think the mods patrol the forums 24/7.

Don't worry about it too much, if you think about it it's pretty normal behavior. We'd all like someone more attractive than ourselves given the opportunity.
 
LeaningIntoTheMuse said:
Please close the ******* motherfucking thread.

How nicely do I have to ask? I'm the OP! Close the **** thread!

Relax, Muse. Give it some time.
 
I just think this thread was a mistake.

I need to learn to get better, not keep on going into these downward spirals. The insults at the end, by a member and an admin, were the last straw.

I just want the thread closed. Forget that I said I am physically unattractive...you just called me ugly. Just stop insulting me, and close the thread. That's all I want.
 
Muse *hugs* you're not ugly dude. Who is to say what is ugly really.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Latest posts

Back
Top