No one wants to commit anymore

[kamya]

This thread has gone off topic a bit. =p

I first heard of and followed mgtow stuff about 6 or 7 years ago. At that time it had nothing to do with women or anything. It was more about being fed up with society or the system and opting to drop out.

I hated the idea of having to find work and making barely any money and having no time to do what i want. And school. Why is it so expensive? I basically didnt want to do adult honeysuckle. There was seriously a point in time where i was considering just being homeless.

I wanted to buy some land and go full hermit mode and started learning survival skills and how to diy everything so id never need to rely on anyone.

It was something that when introduced made me question reality and the way things are done. What society expects and whats accepted of you. Made me start to examine my own beliefs and influences and why i was doing what i was doing in life. Whether or not i was doing what i wanted or if i was just living up to the expectations of everyone else.

I think there's merit in ideas and communities that can do that.

Its changed a lot since then and it makes me sad really. Maybe a crazy prepper community is where ill have to go for that now. :O

The post i made wasnt really about mgtow though. I cant say i identify with what its been morphed into at all. It was just what my current feelings are about how ill probably feel in my late 30s if i stay single. Who knows what would really happen though.

 

[VanillaCreme]

Exactly, now we are getting there. Movements form around shared ideas and values and as I said before, collectivism is a thing and most people will seek for some sort of community or solidarity. Unless you are a very strong individualist. Which I believe you are, Nilla.

Correct. I am.

But I think it's terribly wrong to assume that nobody cares where these men are going. Or that nobody shamed them for the outrageous choice of taking care of themselves first...which happened long before extreme voices became louder within the movement.

I really don't care. I don't care if someone's gay or straight, black or white, male or female. I honestly and truly don't care. I treat people based on how they treat me. I don't base my behavior on what anyone else has told me or what anyone else has gone through. I couldn't care less how someone is or what they do, and unless I've experienced myself, there's no judgment passed on my behalf.

It's not about shaming them. Whoever wants to go their own way and do whatever, hey, more power to them. I just don't see why the rest of us should take notice. And that goes for much of any movement; Not just this one.

 

[kamya]

Why are you taking notice then? =p is someone forcing you dood?

 

[VanillaCreme]

Why are you taking notice then? =p is someone forcing you dood?

I'm not. I'm just wondering why people think it's supposed to be important.

 

[kamya]

I dont think anyone would say its supposed to be important. Its important to the people that its important to and im sure they dont really care if others think its important or not. Thats kind of the point of the idea in the first place really.

Its not a movement trying to accomplish anything. Its more of a growing cultural phenomenon/ trend.

 

[user 115627]

I really don't care. I don't care if someone's gay or straight, black or white, male or female. I honestly and truly don't care. I treat people based on how they treat me. I don't base my behavior on what anyone else has told me or what anyone else has gone through. I couldn't care less how someone is or what they do, and unless I've experienced myself, there's no judgment passed on my behalf.

It's not about shaming them. Whoever wants to go their own way and do whatever, hey, more power to them. I just don't see why the rest of us should take notice. And that goes for much of any movement; Not just this one.

That's all fine and dandy. I don't care either and I'm a strong individualist too, but this is not about you, me or any single individual. We have to acknowledge that there are people who do care an awful lot about all of the things you mentioned and these people are not exactly a tiny minority either. Everything else would be a denial of reality.

 

[VanillaCreme]

Again, if I knew more about it, maybe I'd understand it a bit more. But I just don't care to know about things like that. Things like that seems like mostly talk.

 

[TheDude76]

Again, if I knew more about it, maybe I'd understand it a bit more. But I just don't care to know about things like that. Things like that seems like mostly talk.

And I, being a man, could just as easily dismiss issues affecting women.

 

[VanillaCreme]

Again, if I knew more about it, maybe I'd understand it a bit more. But I just don't care to know about things like that. Things like that seems like mostly talk.

And I, being a man, could just as easily dismiss issues affecting women.

I'm not sure what that means, but if you mean feminism, I'll dismiss them with you. That, too, is a bunch of complaining.

 

[ardour]

But now my question is, does it have to be a part of a movement in order for someone - not just a guy - to not want to be someone's meal ticket? I mean, can you really blame someone for saying that?

No, your right, but that's not even the 10% of what they say.

Originally, that was pretty much the sum total of the MGTOW thing. Later, people added all this right wing, "the government is wrong", misogynistic stuff, and as that's not my thing, I was specifically stating so.

MGTOWs believe the majority of women view men as resources to exploit, which is pretty extreme and dogmatic even if one tries to ignore the Going Galt nonsense.

We are here to exploit. It's called "divorce".

Prenuptial agreements make this a non-issue. Assets can also be placed in a trust prior to marriage, where they're considered separate property.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I don't understand why people need groups to believe what they want to believe. You want to "Go your own way," fine, ******* go, but how is it "going your own way" when people are telling you which way to go?

I believe the original intention was to compare experiences, which would have been all well and good. Unfortunately, some folks with very pointed views redefined that group, and now it is what it is.

Men were going their own way long before, but they didn't know that much about each other before the internet came into existence. So when they crossed paths they didn't collectively decide what that "way" was...they were already on it and as TheDude pointed out, shared and compared their experiences.

There are elements within MGTOW co-opt the label and push it in a very specific direction. Traditional conversatives, strict biological determinists or people from the far-right. And there is even an element that is opposed to men's rights advocacy because they believe completely opting out of the "system" is the only way to properly fight it.

...and why do people need groups? Because collectivism in humans is a thing.

I get that people want a place to talk about similar ideas, but I still don't get why you need a movement to do so. Share ideas, but don't make it some big overrated thing that just ends up exploiting something or someone or completely dismissing something or someone.

 

[TheRealCallie]

No, your right, but that's not even the 10% of what they say.

Originally, that was pretty much the sum total of the MGTOW thing. Later, people added all this right wing, "the government is wrong", misogynistic stuff, and as that's not my thing, I was specifically stating so.

MGTOWs believe the majority of women view men as resources to exploit, which is pretty extreme and dogmatic even if one tries to ignore the Going Galt nonsense.

We are here to exploit. It's called "divorce".

Prenuptial agreements make this a non-issue. Assets can also be placed in a trust prior to marriage, where they're considered separate property.

That's not working for me, so here's a link.

[youtube]

 

[Paraiyar]

No, your right, but that's not even the 10% of what they say.

Originally, that was pretty much the sum total of the MGTOW thing. Later, people added all this right wing, "the government is wrong", misogynistic stuff, and as that's not my thing, I was specifically stating so.

MGTOWs believe the majority of women view men as resources to exploit, which is pretty extreme and dogmatic even if one tries to ignore the Going Galt nonsense.

We are here to exploit. It's called "divorce".

Prenuptial agreements make this a non-issue. Assets can also be placed in a trust prior to marriage, where they're considered separate property.

This ignores the fact that prenups can be overturned.

 

[Urban Outlaw]

* until we are at a point where there really isn't much incentive to commit. What exactly do guys get out of it anymore? Especially if they are a catch. If they date they can have sex with a different woman every night. They can stay with a woman for a long time and drop her like a hot potato if they get sick of her -- as long as they don't "commit" When they get older and they want to "settle down" they can find some 20 year old who will pop a few kids out before becoming aware and kicking him to the curve.

That sounds very unappealing to me. I'm sure that there are men and women out there who live like that (and I pass no judgement) but I'm the complete opposite. I want to have a deep emotional connection to a special someone, I want to be supportive in taking care of our family and each other, I want to grow old and reach that point where we can laugh at each other's farts. Maybe I'm kidding myself in thinking that sort of relationship still exists but I'd much rather that than casual sex and a disposable attitude.

I can't comment on this MGTOW thing as its never appealed to me. No disrespect to those that follow it but I'd only say something wrong if I tried commentating on something I know little about.

 

[user 115627]

I get that people want a place to talk about similar ideas, but I still don't get why you need a movement to do so. Share ideas, but don't make it some big overrated thing that just ends up exploiting something or someone or completely dismissing something or someone.

I know you're a strong individualist as well, Callie. But the movement is already there, so people join it. Some might avoid it because of the radical elements, others will not care about these propagandists and join the community for the regular folks. Having a label just makes things easier to distinguish. It's up to the individual if they want to open themselves to a certain level of guilt by association when they take on a label.

 

[TheDude76]

No, your right, but that's not even the 10% of what they say.

Originally, that was pretty much the sum total of the MGTOW thing. Later, people added all this right wing, "the government is wrong", misogynistic stuff, and as that's not my thing, I was specifically stating so.

MGTOWs believe the majority of women view men as resources to exploit, which is pretty extreme and dogmatic even if one tries to ignore the Going Galt nonsense.

We are here to exploit. It's called "divorce".

Prenuptial agreements make this a non-issue. Assets can also be placed in a trust prior to marriage, where they're considered separate property.

In theory. Those contracts are often ignored in court here or have been nullified by later legislation. Marriage is weird like that: yeah, it's a contract, but it can be changed readily without a party's consent.

 

[KTMChristian]

I hear you!!!! I work out, I've always been called gorgeous or hansom by my girlfriends. I work hard and keep a tidy home and yet I struggle to keep a relationship. I'm figuring the problem is me???? I just don't understand? I spend a large portion of my life alone and I'm sick of it!!!!!

 

[AmytheTemperamental]

I hear you!!!! I work out, I've always been called gorgeous or hansom by my girlfriends. I work hard and keep a tidy home and yet I struggle to keep a relationship. I'm figuring the problem is me???? I just don't understand? I spend a large portion of my life alone and I'm sick of it!!!!!

What is your personality like?

 

[BadGuy]

I hear you!!!! I work out, I've always been called gorgeous or hansom by my girlfriends. I work hard and keep a tidy home and yet I struggle to keep a relationship. I'm figuring the problem is me???? I just don't understand? I spend a large portion of my life alone and I'm sick of it!!!!!

What is your personality like?

there is more than just looks ? LOL

 

[AmytheTemperamental]

I hear you!!!! I work out, I've always been called gorgeous or hansom by my girlfriends. I work hard and keep a tidy home and yet I struggle to keep a relationship. I'm figuring the problem is me???? I just don't understand? I spend a large portion of my life alone and I'm sick of it!!!!!

What is your personality like?

there is more than just looks ? LOL

:club: