Plastic surgery

[toomanypuppies]

I feel so ugly that it's probably my only hope.

Anyone else had plastic surgery? Did it help your social/dating life?

I'm female, so looks matter. It's a rhinoplasty that I need. (Don't want to post pic here, but if anyone is willing to give an objective critique of my looks privately, please PM me).

 

[SophiaGrace]

If you feel plastic surgery would make you feel more satisfied with your life, go for it. It's your life. live it. The only advice i have for you is make usre you have an excellent surgeon.

 

[ladyforsaken]

Yup, what SophiaGrace said. Do what you feel is best for you, but be very careful and do your research first before going into this (obviously you will) but just sayin'. Good luck!

 

[perfanoff]

Just wanted to add that looks matter just as much for guys. Good luck out there

 

[toomanypuppies]

Thanks for the support, everyone! The only thing that forces me to really think this decision over is the nearly five-figure price and all the downtime required during recovery. But if it really makes a difference, I can deal with it.

Anyone ever done it? How has life changed for you?

 

[Tiina63]

What is rhinoplasty? Is it a nose job? I think that, if it will make a big difference to your happiness and self exteem, then go for it. But at the same time you do sound a bit uncertain. Is there someone you could discuss it with in real life as well as talking about it here?

 

[SophiaGrace]

I've had a lot of plastic reconstructive surgeries which are different than plastic cosmetic surgeries.

 

[Limlim]

Five figures does seem like a lot. But on the other hand I think about all of the money I've spent on computer equipment for entertainment purposes, which is something I value highly. Your nose you pretty much have to look at every day, and if you think it will increase your quality of life for the rest of your life then the cost doesn't seem all that enormous.

Also probably safer than fake boobs.

 

[bulmabriefs144]

I generally tell people to live their own lives however they feel.

However...

I feel so ugly that it's probably my only hope.

Anyone else had plastic surgery? Did it help your social/dating life?

Read this again. It's not how you are, it's how you feel.

Changing your appearance cannot change how you feel inside. So, after throwing money down the drain, you may not even like your new nose. (Yes, breast surgery is worse, as it can collapse and hurt your chest and/or leak and give you cancer).

A sex change is a gradual process, except for the ending genital surgery and even that has psych counseling to get used to.

A nose job? You don't look like yourself anymore, in some ways this is worse. You'd be better off saving your money and learning to feel better with yourself.

An ounce of self worth is apparently worth five figures. Take that to the bank, and spend those on treating yourself like you matter (maybe a vacation).

 

[Wessik]

Ok. Listen Up. In all likelihood, this is not a good decision, and here's why:

You are getting a rhinoplasty.

If you were hideously deformed and/or had some sort of disgusting birthmark that was responsible for cruel and inhumane treatment at the hands of your fellow peers, then you would be getting plastic surgery to correct that defect.

Getting a rhinoplasty is the plastic surgery equivalent of getting a haircut. Unless your nose is ridiculously huge, and I mean, like Boris Yeltsin Clown nose huge, very few people will actually notice, especially if they have not met you before.

To add insult to injury, the rhinoplasty is often touted as the number one procedure to get for women looking to appear attractive. This is, however, completely unsubstantiated and likely to be statistically wrong. The vast majority of women already have small noses, including women of African descent. Any improvement in your appearance that you may get from a rhinoplasty will be quite marginal. You would get a larger amount of attention with some carefully applied makeup, a padded bra, and a thong.

In light of all this, I can not say with 100% certainty that you absolutely do not need a rhinoplasty. At best, I can only say that it is highly, highly unlikely. If you add to this that plastic surgery often costs a lot of money...

Well. There is a problem. This is a dangerous road, because if the rhinoplasty doesn't work, then you'll get a liposuction. And when that doesn't work, you'll get a boob job. When that fails, you'll get laser wax removal. Labioplasty. Butt Implants. Facial restructuring.

This is a problem because these treatments are all very expensive. They often have the result of making the girl look very, very attractive, but do not have the desired effect of raising self-esteem. At this point, sexual misconduct begins to take a turn for the worse.

Uhmm...yeah. So...sorry if I have scared you in any way shape or form. It could be that I am entirely wrong. At the same time, it is never bad advice to err on the side of caution when things like self-esteem are involved.

:edit:
I should probably mention that the smallness of women's noses is comparative to the size of a man's. A good rule of thumb: If you're nose is smaller than the nose of the very next man you see, you're sexy. If it is about the same size, you are safe. If it is larger, then a rhinoplasty will have a significant effect. :3

 

[ajdass1]

:edit:
I should probably mention that the smallness of women's noses is comparative to the size of a man's. A good rule of thumb: If you're nose is smaller than the nose of the very next man you see, you're sexy. If it is about the same size, you are safe. If it is larger, then a rhinoplasty will have a significant effect. :3

I think even this is not necessarily true. For example some men, like Chinese or Filipino men, can have very small noses and even within racial groups there's so much variation that a man with a small nose or a woman with a big nose are simply outliers and it's one of these secondary characteristics that seems like a big deal to you because you spend so much time looking in a mirror, but other people aren't necessarily going to notice it.

 

[SophiaGrace]

If you were hideously deformed and/or had some sort of disgusting birthmark that was responsible for cruel and inhumane treatment at the hands of your fellow peers, then you would be getting plastic surgery to correct that defect.

Ahem. I've had like 15 reconstructive surgeries due to a congenital abnormality. I believe this is what you are referring to.

Be careful the language you use. Plenty of people with low self esteem on this site.

Actually, you've managed to offend me since i specifically said in a post before yours that i had had reconstructive surgeries.

 

[ajdass1]

If you were hideously deformed and/or had some sort of disgusting birthmark that was responsible for cruel and inhumane treatment at the hands of your fellow peers, then you would be getting plastic surgery to correct that defect.

Ahem. I've had like 15 reconstructive surgeries due to a congenital abnormality. I believe this is what you are referring to.

Be careful the language you use. Plenty of people with low self esteem on this site.

Yeah. The relevant part of your comment was 'inhumane treatment.' There was no need whatsoever for 'hideously deformed' or 'disgusting birthmark,' those words can be really hurtful.

 

[Iceman1978]

I had a rhinoplasty back in 2001. I have no regrets and would do it again in a heartbeat, but I don't like my face. Having the rhinoplasty only improved what was a bad situation rather than fix it. If I could I would have a full face transplant but to my knowledge I don't think they have that kind of technology.

 

[leece]

I had a rhinoplasty two years ago, in my mid-forties, and my only regret is that I didn't do it 25 years ago. As soon as the splints came off, it was as if people were finally treating me "normally." Especially other women, go figure.

Several people (probably wiser than me) explained that my perception was simply that...just a *perception*, not reality. Because I felt that I now looked more conventionally "acceptable," I carried myself more confidently.

Perhaps that's true. A famous old self-help book titled Psycho-Cybernetics, written by a plastic surgeon, really emphasizes this point. Several of his patients never felt "acceptable," no matter how many surgeries they had done. They continued to feel ashamed and unattractive. Meanwhile, there were people who were comfortable in their own skin and around other people, no matter their appearance. It got him thinking about the mental component of self-confidence and success. Basically, he had patients visualize in vivid detail every single day that they were beautiful. After a certain number of days...I want to say 21 days...most of those patients literally did feel better about themselves. Their self-concept had changed.

The funny thing is, post-rhinoplasty, I now find people with larger noses much more attractive than before. More "real." It makes me sad because deep down, I never thought I was "ugly"....several ex's let me know otherwise though.

If you really want to do this...research your surgeon carefully, because there's a high rate of do-overs, especially tip refinement. Make sure they have a ton of good patient references and testimonials. You may not get the perfect result you want anyways, despite all the glowing reviews. (My nose healed crooked at the bottom and the tip feels very weird but I'll settle for it the way it is.)

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

I wonder if you are actually unattractive, or if you just feel that way?

Because it is what you said. You feel unattractive. Therefore, you want plastic surgery.

This is most likely Body Dismorphic Disorder, and probably the reason why you feel unattractive is simply, in your head. This doesn't mean that you don't need to work on yourself, but you need to work on how you feel about yourself, rather than what is on the outside.

 

[Iceman1978]

I am unattractive. It's not just in my head. I have been told right to my face that I'm unattractive.

 

[jakee31]

I had my nose broken twice. I had five operations on my nose and one on a crushed cheekbone. I needed to have cartilage taken from my ear to revamp my nose and a couple of operations to rub out the cartilage resulting from the fact that the scar tissue wasn't mending fittingly. That was a standout amongst the most frightful operations, however the most noticeably awful was hemorrhoids,.....

 

[duff]

i caught a reflection of myself talking to someone at work in a mirror today.

It was dreadfull, I quickly looked away. I am ugly and my body language, my facial expressions, the way I speak, everything is awfull !

 

[PyramidHead]

I am unattractive. It's not just in my head. I have been told right to my face that I'm unattractive.

Kinda rotten to tell something like that into someones face... I would recommend surgery in such a case... no plastic surgery, but just something to swap the heart and the brain of the person who said it. Some people are truly aweful.

By the way, we are the "good looking" forum, I see it in the faces thread, so nobody should complain.
We all just feel that way, but I haven't seen one ugly person here yet. NOT EVEN a single ONE!!!