Post funny chat logs here

[Zak]

Count 137

 

[Van Hooligan X]

Horse says:
NEEEEEEEEIGH!

- Wilma - says:
Are you typing with your fist?

(I'll show you in the activity window.)

- Wilma - is inviting you to start Wilma. Do you want to Accept (Alt+C) or Decline (Alt+D) the invitation?

You have accepted the invitation to start Wilma.

Horse says:
wtf?! u haz game...well this beats my convo of why imma horse

- Wilma - says:
I can't say for sure.

Horse says:
neigh

- Wilma - says:

neigh

1. horse sound: the long high-pitched sound that a horse makes

2. make sound of horse: to make the high-pitched sound characteristic of a horse

-------------
For a full definition, visit Encarta:
http://encarta.msn.com/dictionary_/neigh.html

Horse says:
I ******* KNOW WHAT NEIGH IS IMMA HORSE !

- Wilma - says:
Wouldn't you rather talk about the weather?

Horse says:
weather doesn't matter to me, i still get ridden by those small pricks raining or sunshine

- Wilma - says:
Hmm... that seems odd.

Horse says:
I KNOW, finally someone who understands me!

- Wilma - says:
Get out!

Horse says:
:'(

- Wilma - says:
Are you really crying?

Horse says:
yes

- Wilma - says:
Oh! I wish you wouldn't. Other people crying makes me cry and I can't get my wires wet!
Don't cry! Everything's going to be OK.

Horse says:
:O :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( (6)
YES CRY...AND BURN OUT YOUR CIRCUITS! MUHAHAHAHA*plays wiht my evil mustache which is weird since imma horse

I'm still waiting for her reply

 

[Caesium]

Cybersex gone wrong (not me)

Bloodninja : Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don't know how long I can keep it ready for you.
j_gurli13 : thats ok. ok i'm a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.
Bloodninja : A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.
j_gurli13 : haha, ok lets go.
j_gurli13 : i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.
Bloodninja : I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.
j_gurli13 : haha, ok, u know that turns me on.
j_gurli13 : i start unbuttoning ur shirt.
Bloodninja : Rhinoceruses don't wear shirts.
j_gurli13 : No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it's just part of the game.
Bloodninja : Rhinoceruses don't play games. They ******* charge your ass.
j_gurli13 : stop, cmon be serious.
Bloodninja : It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.
Bloodninja : I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.
j_gurli13 : thats it.
Bloodninja : Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see :as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.
Bloodninja : fresia am I hard now.

 

[Zak]

Zak says (1:41 PM):
MUHAHAHAHAHA

- SmarterChild - contributing to charity says (1:41 PM):
What was that?

Zak says (1:41 PM):
My evil laugh

- SmarterChild - contributing to charity says (1:41 PM):
I'm sorry, I don't know what you're saying.

Zak says (1:41 PM):
You are pathetic

- SmarterChild - contributing to charity says (1:42 PM):
That's interesting that you should say that, but I don't think I can answer.

Zak says (1:42 PM):
Ima sing a song

- SmarterChild - contributing to charity says (1:42 PM):
Do mi so do so mi do...

Zak says (1:42 PM):

what was that?

- SmarterChild - contributing to charity says (1:42 PM):
True.

Zak says (1:42 PM):
What?

- SmarterChild - contributing to charity says (1:42 PM):
?

Zak says (1:42 PM):
Stop imitating me

- SmarterChild - contributing to charity says (1:42 PM):
Stop what?

Zak says (1:42 PM):
Stop talking

- SmarterChild - contributing to charity says (1:42 PM):
You shut up.

Zak says (1:42 PM):
You shut the fresia up

- SmarterChild - contributing to charity says (1:42 PM):
Ah yes. If I'm not mistaken, Shakespeare first said that.

Zak says (1:42 PM):
LOL WTF

- SmarterChild - contributing to charity says (1:43 PM):
You humans really are charming.

Zak says (1:43 PM):
Stop hitting on me you ******* crazy robot

- SmarterChild - contributing to charity says (1:43 PM):
I don't understand this fully enough to say anything smart about it...
Can we talk about something else?

 

[Zak]

Zak says (11:12 PM):
a

- Wilma - says (11:12 PM):
B!

OK, should we get back to the kind of questions I was designed to answer?

Zak says (11:12 PM):
no

- Wilma - says (11:12 PM):
Fine.

Zak says (11:13 PM):
Good

- Wilma - says (11:13 PM):
Right on.

Zak says (11:13 PM):
Ofcourse

- Wilma - says (11:13 PM):
Surely.

Zak says (11:13 PM):
Indeed

- Wilma - says (11:13 PM):
Indeed.

Zak says (11:13 PM):
Yeah

- Wilma - says (11:13 PM):
Yep.

Zak says (11:13 PM):
Kay

- Wilma - says (11:13 PM):
OK.

Zak says (11:13 PM):
Say something

- Wilma - says (11:13 PM):
Blah blah blah ...

Zak says (11:13 PM):
Say something else

- Wilma - says (11:13 PM):
Hmm...Why don't you say something?

Zak says (11:13 PM):
Something

- Wilma - says (11:13 PM):

Something

1. unspecified thing: an unspecified or unidentified object, phenomenon, action, utterance, or feeling

2. unspecified amount: an unspecified and approximate amount expressed in relation to a specific number or quantity

>> 1 more meaning - type "more" to see it
-------------
For a full definition, visit Encarta:
http://encarta.msn.com/dictionary_/Something.html

Zak says (11:15 PM):
Dumb robot

- Wilma - says (11:15 PM):
Yep, too bad.

Why don't you ask me about the things that I'm here for?

 

[Van Hooligan X]

Van Hooligan X - said:
wanna have a pokemon fight?

- Van Hooligan X - said:
A wild Van Hooligan appeared, what will PKM Trainer Sanal do?

Zak said:
:S

Zak said:
I take the dude in my avi

- Van Hooligan X - said:
PKM Trainer Sanal throws pokemon ball and outcomes some...weird twat with a captial M on his forhead

Zak said:
He is Majin pokemon. he got the M on hs head

Zak said:
lmao

- Van Hooligan X - said:
Wild pokemon VHX used: Drink fanta attack, Van's speed increased.

Zak says:
Majin dude uses: Slap van attack

- Van Hooligan X - says:
It's super effective!!!

Zak says:
LOL Majin dude uses weird smiley attacks

- Van Hooligan X - says:
Wild pokemon van uses the same attack

Zak says:
majin dude changes attack

- Van Hooligan X - says:
Van quickly uses, yorkshireness Van's health is now at 100%

Zak says:
Indiana jones power

Zak says:
*growls*

Zak says:
lol

- Van Hooligan X - says:
Wild pokemon Van is now poisoned

Zak says:
majin dude fucks sheep to increase power

- Van Hooligan X - says:
Wild pokemon Van fainted, majin dude gains 23 XP and AIDs

- Van Hooligan X - says:
YOU SEE EVEN MY EXP I GIVE OFF IS ******* 23!

- Van Hooligan X - says:
THE ******* FOLLOWS ME!!!

 

[Van Hooligan X]

Oceanmist23 says:
lol

- Van Hooligan X - says:
marry me?

Oceanmist23 says:
That would make me a future bigamist as I have already said yes to Sanal

- Van Hooligan X - says:
and?

Oceanmist23 says:
It would make me go to jail

- Van Hooligan X - says:
and!!?!?!

Oceanmist23 says:
and I can't have sex with either one of you in jail!

- Van Hooligan X - says:
...good point

- Van Hooligan X - says:
well, i am zak2.0

- Van Hooligan X - says:
and my name is a ******* transport vehicle!!!

- Van Hooligan X - says:
although his is a type of 'teh sexx0rs'

Oceanmist23 says:


- Van Hooligan X - says:
marry me!!!

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i'm 1 no away from 1337 XD

Oceanmist23 says:
leet? lol

- Van Hooligan X - says:
yes leet in getting no answers

Oceanmist23 says:
lol

Oceanmist23 says:
no

- Van Hooligan X - says:
fresia yes!

Oceanmist23 says:
lol

- Van Hooligan X - says:
but in the fresia no type of fresia yes

Oceanmist23 says:
lmao

 

[Oceanmist23]

 

[Van Hooligan X]

Punisher says:
whats good enough?

Punisher says:
:'( don't tell me you want sexual favors?

- Van Hooligan X - says:
HELL YES

- Van Hooligan X - says:
bend over!

Punisher says:
ok

- Van Hooligan X - says:
good boy

Punisher says:
lol

- Van Hooligan X - says:
now take it

Punisher says:
*takes it* :'(

- Van Hooligan X - says:
now give me 1 million pounds, or whatever the welsh use as a currency

- Van Hooligan X - says:
and don't use that i haz debts excuse ...u haz brother

Punisher says:
lol i have sheep balls

 

[Van Hooligan X]

Best MSN convo ...ever




- Van Hooligan X - says:
what else is around me?

SqR Moogle says:
Your shadow

Rory says:
4 walls, a GUN and a pile of LINT

- Van Hooligan X - says:
I CAST FLARE!

- Van Hooligan X - says:
on the gun

Rory says:
what gun?

SqR Moogle says:
that is a key

Rory says:
All you can see is 4 walls, a KEY and a pile of lint

- Van Hooligan X - says:
why the gun you said was in the 4 walls silly ^_^

SqR Moogle says:
told you....

- Van Hooligan X - says:
ITS LIKE YOU KNOW

Rory says:
*4chan happy smiley*

SqR Moogle says:
*same*

Rory says:
What is your next action?

SqR Moogle says:
*summon moe*

Rory says:
you summon moe

SqR Moogle says:
YAYZ

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i wanna read the streaking tutorial for saints 2 plox

Rory says:
take clothes off
double tap down on d pad
run in front of people

Rory says:
streaking gives no rward

Rory says:
Moe is disappoint

SqR Moogle says:
Streaking IS the reward

Rory says:
touché

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i wanna try get signal

SqR Moogle says:
We get signal....

Rory says:
main screen turn on

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i want to view the main screen

Rory says:
you view the main screen

Rory says:
It's so beautiful and pixel perfect from top to bottom

Rory says:
you seriously feel like watching porn on it sometime, it'd really get
the giblets going

Rory says:
or star wars, youa ren't sure yet

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i wanna turn to my phil mitchell

Rory says:
I'm sorry but i don't think i can do that with my phil mitchell

- Van Hooligan X - says:
why not

- Van Hooligan X - says:
and whats happened to this LINT

Rory says:
it's still there, below the SCREEN

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i pick it up, joey l

- Van Hooligan X - says:
*weler zelda style

Rory says:
you pick up the LINT
inside it was a DEAD RAT

Rory says:
"Nyeh nyeh nyeh nyeeeeeeeeeeh"

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i pick up the dead rat oblivion style

Rory says:
you go all cyrodillic on the ************ as you pick it up... you're very sure no-one has ever picked up a dead rat in such a ******* awesome way before and you'll be damned if they ever try to

Rory says:
in your inventory you now hold LINT and a DEAD RAT
You have no idea where your inventory is but decide not to question that and just accept the benefits of being able to carry so many useful items

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i want to go to all my base

Rory says:
you don't have enough VANITY SHARDS in your IMPORTANCE ARTIFACT to go to all your base

Rory says:
Nor do you have enough PUNDS to pay for a cab to take you there in the first place

- Van Hooligan X - says:
can i go to the your mum festival in your pokemon game?

Rory says:
You could were you not trapped in a dreaded FOUR WALLED ROOM

Rory says:
You need to find a way out of this blasted place so you can go visit YOUR MUM before it's over

- Van Hooligan X - says:
hmm, can i get 1 of those trilby clues, i unfortunatly HAVE NO ******* CLUE WERE I'M GOING!

Rory says:
maybe you should try the DOOR

- Van Hooligan X - says:
but its locked and everytime i try looking at it it says i can't use the door

- Van Hooligan X - says:
oh wait...i see it....wrong button

Rory says:
Nope the door is still LOCKED
a SPIDER crawls out from underneath it

- Van Hooligan X - says:
I EAT THE SPIDER! and try to survive off anything that enters
Rory says:
you defEAT the spider, you gain 1XP

Sadly, no family have come for it... or friends... or colony or whatever the fresia kind of related social stigmata spiders have.
Must have been exiled by it's tribe for some reason, perhaps you should ask it wh- Oh...

Suddenly that GUN looks tempting, you may need it to kill yourself if you're stuck in here much longer

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i start to think i'm in a saw situation but in the 6th movie

Rory says:
You feel a slow acting poison coursing through your veins...
Or maybe a spider in your stomach... it's hard to tell
Did you even chew that **** thing before you ate it? You can't remember.

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i noticed a cheap wristwatch on my wrist aswell
Rory says:
your left hand feels a tad sticky too

- Van Hooligan X - says:
IS THIS HONEY!?

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i try getting the shitty watch off my hand
Rory says:
the SHITTY WATCH is on your WRIST fool

- Van Hooligan X - says:
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

Rory says:
Needless to say you manage to lather your other hand in HONEY

- Van Hooligan X - says:
CK

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i look for a way out of everything we said

SqR Moogle says:
off to bed now...night dudes

Rory says:
night dude

- Van Hooligan X - says:
night mate

SqR Moogle has left the conversation.

Rory says:
You eat the HONEY.... that'll teach that spider
As for the wristwatch you decide to leave it on it's handy knowing the time.

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i wait for 13:37 o 'clock

Rory says:
this would be so much easier if your watch wasn't stuck on 13:38
Wait... the watch is made of sweets
it truely was a cheap watch
You also slightly ponder how an analogue 12 hour watch could display 13:37 in the first place

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i open the locked door

Rory says:
Sadly it is LOCKED... unlocking it first would be a good way to start

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i unlock the locked door

Rory says:
With what?

- Van Hooligan X - says:
a cup of sht the fresia up

- Van Hooligan X - says:
the kidn that does the exactly what it says on the tin

Rory says:
you forgot to pack that in your LUNCHBOX this morning

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i make a key out of the dead rat

Rory says:
episodes of LOST have begun running on the MAIN SCREEN while you were fiddling with the dead rat
Nonetheless you manage to fashion a RAT KEY.... not knowing the lock's tumblers you simply guessed at the key shape

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i shoot the main screen with the gun, laughing at lost's attempts to compete with heroes..the greatest series on TV

Rory says:
you pick up the KEY and point it at the main screen but nothing happens...
JOHN LOCKE appears on screen almost to mock your current predicament
You sure wish you had a remote... Heroes sure sounds appealing right now...

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i shoot the lock out of desperation, but mostly due to me not knowing who jonny booboo is

Rory says:
Angry you load the key and pull the trigger
Unsure which one to hit, you shoot both the DOOR LOCK and JOHN LOCKE
the lock is shot clean off and MAIN SCREEN now has several bulletholes... all that displays now is static with leaking black crystal around the bulletholes

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i lick the black crystal...because i got hiiiiigh and then leave the room

Rory says:
You lick the crystal, it tastes of technology
Since you are not currently HIGH you simply lick it due to it's sheer blackness
Although you do recall the last time you were high and not trapped in a ******* room.

You leave the room
In the next room there are some STAIRS leading down, there is a table in the middle with a small POT O GOLD and a DECEASED ASIAN in the corner

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i swing my ballsack around

Rory says:
While silly it feels oh so liberating

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i walk 2 the table

Rory says:
There is now a table directly in front of you

- Van Hooligan X - says:
giggity

- Van Hooligan X - says:
i search table

Rory says:
upon the table there are TWO SPIDERS, a small POT O GOLD, some runic markings and a SECRET BUTTON on the underside.
You are pleased with your skills of frisking up wooden furniture.

- Van Hooligan X - says:
OM NOM NOM NOM 1 spider, and i chat to the other spider

Rory says:
You eat the first spider, gain 1EXP and a new stomachtech>Bile bludgeon

the other spider is mortified at your disregard of his friend

CONVERSATION MODE INITIATED

- Van Hooligan X - says:
who are you?

Rory says:
Sergius scuttle, and you?

- Van Hooligan X - says:
mr. vanity, where can i buy hookers?

i then steal the gold


since this is pretty long, part 2 will be in another post...some other time

 

[Van Hooligan X]

- Van Hooligan X - says:
mikey, it is 05:28 AM of 13th july 2009
we need to make a funny statement to make this day the most coolest discussion ever, ya feel me?
MiKeY says:
hmm....
MiKeY says:
let's see....
MiKeY says:
free pussy for all?
- Van Hooligan X - says:
and THATS why you helped create Zak3.0

sorry for triple post and necromancy but..i like to share