Some of your lonely quirks

[An archist]

Ok, so since I'm incredibly self-conscious I tend to pour over every minute little thing that I do whenever I'm around people, and some of them are quite strange. The point of this thread is for you to share some of the bizare quirks of yours that you think are somehow related to your social condition. I guess I'll start and maybe an example will clarify what I'm talking about here.

So, I've developed the strange habbit of not looking at people. I somehow feel that I'm not allowed to look at them because I'm so inferior to everybody. Whenever I do find myself observing somebody, I feel like a naughty little 8th grader peeping into the ladies' locker room! What makes this quirk particularly quirky is that, since I'm so worried about people observing me and talking/giggling about me, I'm always very tempted to see what they're up to, but cannot bring myself to look at them directly. It's like a game! (a very messed up, morbid game of social ineptitude...but a game nonetheless!)

Other times I kind of turn into stone. I feel that any kind of motion I might make will be wrong somehow, so I try not to do anything. If I'm hot, there's no way I'll take off my jacket. If I have to sneeze, I won't go into my bag to get a tissue, etc...

Well, I hope to hear some intersting peculiarities from all of you!

 

[mimizu]

I feel self-conscious and often get the feeling that I'm being looked at. So I move alongside walls, sit in corners, and generally try to make myself as unnoticeable as possible. When I see people laugh it feels like they are laughing about me. I have to tell myself "it's probably some joke between them". But that doesn't have to be ture, just because it's a "proper approach". They could be laughing at me after all. =_=

 

[jales]

Okay, sometimes I go into this mood where I won't talk to people for days, or (if possible) wont leave where I live for days.. if during my 'alone' time someone speaks to me...
like if someone calls, or if someone comes by...my heart starts to race...I get really nervous and it last for hours, n hours....after they are gone.

Also I scare easily, I think it's a result of little interaction. Like someone could just be saying hi...and they will scare me.. it's sort of like I'm zoned out when among people and little disturbances have a big effect; like someone passing so close or so. Does this happen to anyone else?

But I dont have social anxiety or so...

 

[An archist]

I can totally relate to what both of you are describing.

On the one hand I know that I must be so insignificant that people couldn't possibly give enough of a honeysuckle about me to observe my every move and be judging me constantly, but on the other hand maybe all of the fears and dread that I expirence in people's presance are more noticable than I might think, so I really can't stand it when people laugh or even talk around me. The most nerve wracking moments of my day are those 10 or so minutes right before class where everybody's sitting at their desks and chatting, while I sit in the corner by myself. School is a nightmare for me! Sitting in the corner is key. That way, at least nobody behind and on one side can be observing me, and those in front of me would have to go out of their way to turn around in order to look at me.

I hate ringing phones! I get very afraid whenever I hear it ring, and the phone is off the hook almost all day. When it does ring, I never, ever pick it up because I'm afraid it might be some person from my past who might want to hang out with me or whatever. And since I've changed into a real wretched, social basketcase I don't want these people to see the new me.

I'll never forget this one expirence I had in my first semester of college. I was stitting next to these two people who were fooling around and I felt like a presure cooker of panic and fear. Then all of a sudden the girl accidentally nugded my and I jumped! They looked at me as if lobsters were crawling out of my ears, and asked why I looked so afraid. That was horrible confirmation that I what feel like on the inside can indeed be percieved on the outside.

 

[Kristen]

I sometimes, in past almost every time , get shy when meeting some one new and when u have to shake their hand and kiss them. wtf. Also I have a friend that is way too loud in public. She would disscuss my problems outside and every one who passed by just stared at me and not at her even though I just stand there quietly whispering to her "please stop screaming". And also I hate when she has a habit of introducing me to some1 new screaming like "meet my friend Kristina!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" poiting to me. She makes it look like a big deal and then the new person is waiting for me to say something smart or funny. And I have nothing to say.I mean someone being so loud in public emmbarrases me . Some people even like that. oh, man and I have much more stuff


the feeling that someone was laughing at me even though they were'nt used to paralize me completely. Its terrible and so uncomfortable .


I remember, this b. ( I hate her) my aunt---i'll start using "the mean woman" lol ,signed me up for SAT practicing class at Kaplan. That was when I moved to US and spoke no English at all. So I'm sitting in this class numb with all these smarty pants kids calling out the right answers. Then and now I always sit at the last row in class, corner by the door and wall. I'm like a door man . If some1 just says :"can u please shut that door" I know its me. Anyway, so the teacher asked us each read this scientific peace of text. So my turn was near the end of period and I'm sitting there sweating praying and thinking" stupid bell ring ring ring..God make it ring" lol, now that I think about it I'm laughing at myself but then it was a nightmare. Well, I had to read it anyway....it was embarrassing. After that I never went back to that class. I usually avoided any attention ,would also try to make myself invisible and wish that I was.
My teen years was such a pain. My aunt made them unbearable.


I also take off the phone of the hook sometimes just don't want to answer any questions anymore.

 

[NeverMore]

Sitting in the corner is key. That way, at least nobody behind and on one side can be observing me, and those in front of me would have to go out of their way to turn around in order to look at me.

You are very right! I think the same way, and always sit either in the corner or with my back to a wall when I eat in the university cafeteria alone(which is always)

When it does ring, I never, ever pick it up because I'm afraid it might be some person from my past who might want to hang out with me or whatever. And since I've changed into a real wretched, social basketcase I don't want these people to see the new me.

What makes you think you've become a basketcase since knowing them? Everyone changes outside of high school, changing doesn't necessarily mean you've gotten crazier does it?
For me it's just not wanting to talk to anyone on the phone. I tell everyone that if you want to contact me text me or e-mail me or leave me a facebook message, just DON'T call me, I will not pick up unless on very rare occasions when I feel comfortable talking to the caller like my brother but that's about it no one else can call

I'll never forget this one expirence I had in my first semester of college. I was stitting next to these two people who were fooling around and I felt like a presure cooker of panic and fear. Then all of a sudden the girl accidentally nugded my and I jumped! They looked at me as if lobsters were crawling out of my ears, and asked why I looked so afraid.

Lobsters crawling out of your ears,lol, I guess that would warrant some attention! I remember one time I was running around the track for gym in high school and someone came up behind me and said "hi" and I leaped at least 2 feet in the air just out of being so startled!

Also I have a friend that is way too loud in public.

lmao, because I have a pretty deep voice that covers a room easily as if I was giving a speech or something, but it cracks every now and then (which is embarrassing) but I think over the years I've learned to control the volume of my voice better, at least I hope!

I find that I have a lot of little odd quirks, I can't look anyone in the eyes, the best I can manage is to stare at people's cheeks or their forehead. During moments of uncomfortable silence I have a habit of laughing a little bit or if I'm eating then I sit there and keep sipping my drink every couple seconds or eat a French fry or lettuce leaf or an ice cube if I ran out of drink. When I'm talking to someone who is really boring me with generalities and generic stuff like that of no interest then I'll stare into space and let my mind wander, and when I say something next it's usually something that my brain had wandered to that sounds really random like: "Did you know fortune cookies were invented in America?" because I happened to be thinking of fortune cookies etc..

When I'm standing and talking to someone my hands will be usually in the pocket of my hoodie or jeans because I don't know what to do with them. I'll cough or clear my throat more than is necessary if I'm feeling nervous. If I get really nervous then my legs will start to shake and I'll try desperately to sit down... I have a tendency to say yeeaaaa a lot like that guy in Office Space, I don't really know why I do it.. I also stutter when trying to say long sentences or I mispronounce things that I read about and haven't actually heard the word spoke correctly like names of people or places especially bad in history. When I have a story that relates to the conversation and I try to tell it, I usually fail miserably because I'll either forget midway through what my point was and it will end awkwardly or I'll get caught up on a word and keep stuttering over it, that's a nightmare when that happens...

 

[Zorg]

Anyone ever do the fake phone conversation? I have this cell phone, mainly for the purpose of my family to find out where I am, say I'm working late or something like that. Anyway, I frequently hold the cell phone to my ear as if I'm listening intently to someone on the other line. I do this mostly when I leave work at the same time as someone else, more so for their benefit than mine. As in they won't walk into the mistake of trying to strike up a conversation with the world's worst conversationalist (me) - those awkward silences aren't fun for anybody. It's just a way to avoid the awkwardness, especially in those moments where you're almost obliged to talk to the person. Though there are two issues that arise with the fake phone conversation: 1) I feel sometimes that it's not believable, or they can tell that it's fake and 2) That if they can tell it's fake, that makes me the rudest person in their mind, or just the fact that I'm on the phone is somehow rude; if only they knew I do it for them.

Another thing I try to do, is look unaffected, maybe even apathetic to everything. I guess the logic here is to give an "Hey, I don't care if I don't have any friends. Psh, who needs friends? Oh and you, I DON'T care if we talk or not, or if you like me or not, hell I really don't care about anything". Ironic isn't it? I don't know if I do this one well, but it usually involves leaning a lot, trying to move fluidly, and sharpening the one word answers that I'd normally give in a timid tone.

 

[Colette]

I get depressed if I don't get phonecalls during the day. This doesn't mean I'm going to answer them or call them back immediately but it's almost a comfort to know someone was thinking of me. So when the answering machine registers 0 I feel sad.

 

[NeverMore]

I get depressed if I don't get phonecalls during the day. This doesn't mean I'm going to answer them or call them back immediately but it's almost a comfort to know someone was thinking of me. So when the answering machine registers 0 I feel sad.

I know what you mean, nobody's attempted to contact me in any way for about two weeks now, yet I check everyday, my phone, my e-mail, facebook, nothing and each time it makes me sadder and sadder, I think everyone has forgotten about me or they just don't want to talk to me, which depresses me, it makes me wonder what I did wrong,*sigh* I'll just go get lost in some video game and forget my troubles for a while...

 

[Brodie]

I get excited when I am at work and my phone buzzes on silent with a phone call from a person. Makes my day go by quicker and it cheers me up. I'll be on aisle 13 putting up 1000 lb. of water on a shelf, and then my phone will buzz and I'll look left and right to see if any managers are near by and then I'll see that someone left me a voice mail and I'll get happy and then I can't wait till break so I can listen to it. One time I even faked having to use the bathroom just so I could listen to my voice mail.

Wow, I just realized that I sound really pathetic. But, oh well, that's me.

 

[Minus]

Wow, I just realized that I sound really pathetic. But, oh well, that's me.

Not pathetic. It just shows what little things can brighten up a day.

 

[Bluey]

oh old thread.

I went swimming the other day. To a massive swimming place where you would spend all day in there. I was a bit like mimizu (The second post) Walking around in there. I keep trying to look back to see if ppl where looking at me. I did not Catch anyone. But I know for a fact they would had been. On account of my back being well messed up. I too felt a bit funny looking at the other guys and how there back and body was not defamed. It did make me kinder sad. But it always dose in summer time as well.

 

[Minus]

I went swimming the other day.

Great

 

[deliveryguy.]

More of a shy thing, but I find that if you act tired, people almost never talk to you.

Back in school, I was known by almost everyone as the "tired guy". It got totally out of hand, and faking being tired became my "thing".

 

[Lawrens]

I developed a habit of not looking at people all the time too, I only look people in the eyes for a few seconds, but as soon as I established what I have to say, I just look at other places and pretend to do other things when I continue to talk, like take out a cell, check my pocket, or whatever, because it felt like whenever I look people in the eyes, it gives people the wrong impression of what I "think" about them. I used to try very hard looking people in the eyes while I talk and my friend said it felt like I'm trying to flirt with the person, because I kept staring at her without blinking! Some thought I look pissed off or something, so I guess that's why I rather just look away, people only get the impression that I do not care, or just hates their guts, or shy, or whatever, but it's better than thinking that I'm hitting on them, or trying to scare them away, so it's really a multiple layers of social awkwardness about what I think the person think about me, it's some crazy paranoia I have.