ITellYouHhwut
Well-known member
- Joined
- Mar 28, 2019
- Messages
- 132
- Reaction score
- 0
I avoid looking at photos, and especially videos, of myself like the plague. I know I’m going to have my soul totally crushed by what I see. Thus I often go on and forget how shockingly ugly and jacked-up looking I am until I happen to see a photo or video of myself.
Well, today I took a video of myself demonstrating something for a friend, and I was just utterly put into shock by what I saw. Holy sh*t! What a botched, dysgenic, mutant I am, and I’m not even being funny or hyperbolic. I legitimately tried to see something good in myself, but I actually broke down into tears it was so soul-crushing. I just turned out the lights and crawled into bed. It’s just unbelievable what a hideous freak I am.
I know I know, everyone will say “everyone has image issues”, “everyone hates to look at themselves”, blab blah... This is so **** infuriating because you don’t f*cking get it. I’m truly in a category all my own. There’s no way to describe it.
Most people who are ugly, are ugly in a “normal” way. They at least look normal and cohesive. They don’t look like some goofy freakazoid who’s features look like you took ten of the ugliest humans of all different types, cut them up, and randomly pasted them all together to make one freak. I’m not being overly-dramatic. This truly how it is.
I just feel like I don’t want to live. I know people have said my suicide talk is just attention-seeking, but it isn’t. I’m so overwhelmed by how ugly I am that I just don’t want to walk out the f*cking door again. I just want to lay down, pull the covers over my face, and never come out again. Nature can produce some truly unfortunate souls, and I happen to be one of them.
Well, today I took a video of myself demonstrating something for a friend, and I was just utterly put into shock by what I saw. Holy sh*t! What a botched, dysgenic, mutant I am, and I’m not even being funny or hyperbolic. I legitimately tried to see something good in myself, but I actually broke down into tears it was so soul-crushing. I just turned out the lights and crawled into bed. It’s just unbelievable what a hideous freak I am.
I know I know, everyone will say “everyone has image issues”, “everyone hates to look at themselves”, blab blah... This is so **** infuriating because you don’t f*cking get it. I’m truly in a category all my own. There’s no way to describe it.
Most people who are ugly, are ugly in a “normal” way. They at least look normal and cohesive. They don’t look like some goofy freakazoid who’s features look like you took ten of the ugliest humans of all different types, cut them up, and randomly pasted them all together to make one freak. I’m not being overly-dramatic. This truly how it is.
I just feel like I don’t want to live. I know people have said my suicide talk is just attention-seeking, but it isn’t. I’m so overwhelmed by how ugly I am that I just don’t want to walk out the f*cking door again. I just want to lay down, pull the covers over my face, and never come out again. Nature can produce some truly unfortunate souls, and I happen to be one of them.