Tealeaf said:
It's a false correlation that having relationships or not is due to how nice you are, and that if you're nice and failing it's because you're nice.
+10!
The one thing that most ******** have in common (in addition to being ********) is that they usually display confidence. They're assertive. It may be a fake confidence, but they make it look like they're in total control. They go for what they want, because they don't care about consequences, and they don't care who may or may not get hurt by it.
Nice people, however, are usually more considerate. This can make them appear less confident, at least when compared to an *******. Being nice often means that you don't go for what you want, because they don't want to step on anyone's toes. Also, for many, this stereotype about "nice guys finish last" probably doesn't help their confidence either, which makes it even harder to actually do something about those feelings they're having for someone.
Sometimes the nice people just need to be a little more selfish, without going full ****** bag. That is actually possible. Because in my experience, it's not the not-being-nice part that attracts people, but the confidence and assertiveness that often comes from that same group. Also, in my experience, nothing is more attractive than a confident and assertive, yet genuinely nice and good hearted person.
And yes, of course, there are those who just have a thing for ********. Sucks to be them, I say, because they will never know what it's like to be in a loving and caring relationship. And as far as I've noticed, these people are a minority. Most people really do prefer someone nice. So please don't turn into a ******* just because you think that'll improve your chances at love, because it won't. Instead, try turning up the confidence, even though I know that can be insanely difficult.