howtobealone said:
I wonder how much of happiness is genetic predisposition and how much of it is circumstances. Not to sound too negative, but I couldn't imagine having the lives of at least 75% of the people in the world (presuming I still had my negative mindset), and yet many of these people claim to be happy. I think on paper a lot of people would love to have my life, but I'd probably trade places with an average person if he claimed to be happy. I could picture a lot of people being happy if they had my looks, intelligence, life circumstances, even my physical maladies. But I've always been miserable with the life I was given. I hope one day I can enjoy this life of mine, after all, what's to say I can't adopt the mindset of happier people whose lives aren't as appealing as mine on paper?
Wow, this is a very interesting question indeed. I guess a lot of people would or could be happy with my life. Yet I am not.
If I were to enumerate things that people would find positive and how for me are negative maybe you could tell me if you agree or if I am the one that just sees the bad thing.
I still have my mom and my dad My mom and I are not close at all, my dad doesnt get involved as my mom is the dominant one
we have a house For monetary reasons I still live with my parents, but at least I have a place to live
I had clothing All my clothes were hand me downs from my older sister, and i got yelled at when I said kids made fun of me and if i could have something that was actually new and my size (sister is 8 years older)
Have no job I was happier when I had a job, nobody likes their job, but still it was better than doing nothing
Have some medical conditions Here it gets tricky, I have EDS, you might see me and see nothing wrong, i look at me and see everything that is wrong. I have some other issues with health but i believe EDS, is responsible for most.
For me my main issue is I grew up alone, my mom would not let me touch her, talk to her, or be around her, and my dad traveled a lot and was mostly gone, all I remember wanting since I was about 8 was to sleep with someone hugging me, that is all I really want, someone to hug, but not a compromise hug or a void hug, no, someone that loves and cares about you and comes and hugs you really tight, someone that walks with you and out of the blue gives you a kiss. Love and companionship I guess is all I want.
Funny I started cutting myself at about 5 years old, started to dream about having someone to hug at 8. Forgot, maybe someone that understands me.
More than likely, someone who still haves their parents, lives with them, has food and clothes nothing fancy but still, would be happy even with no job, and sick. Oh and single. and a bit old. But still they could be happy, why cant I?