Confidence

[dd11]

People like confidence, self assured people. And, at times, I have been accused of "lacking confidence". However, in reality, I don't lack confidence in my abilities to do things or get things done. But, I don't understand the cockiness and phony self assuredness that I see all around. Sorry, I don't know everything about everything. Nor, do I control all the circumstances. I can control myself and what I can control to the extent that I can control. But, I really find people nowadays to be so cocky and cock sure about what they think they know or will do, when you don't know what God or nature or life has in store for you. Thoughts?

 

[mickey]

I haven't observed excessive confidence in people, but then I don't have contact with many people. The mass media and popular culture do preach excessive self-confidence because being excessively self-confident makes people vulnerable to exploitation, and the powers that be are all about exploiting people. That's the closest I can come to explaining it.

 

[Wayfarer]

I understand where you're coming from. I too have been "accused" of the same, but probably in my case it's true.

I too find some people are unnecessarily arrogant and too sure of themselves. But as you said, people like confident, self assured people. Maybe this is why there's so many out there LOL

 

[Dandelion]

Where does one draw the line between confident or not? I know I am good at certain things. I also know that I do not know EVERYTHING about what I am good at. I just thought that was being humble. I guess people can have too much confidence and some not enough (me). I am working hard to be more confident in all aspects of my life, but how will I know when I got just enough so I don't come off as arrogant?

 

[LonelyInAtl]

I have no problem doing a teleconference presentation for hundreds of people, but me talking to a girl I'm interested in? I'd rather walk over hot coals with gasoline soaked feet.

 

[Tiina63]

People like confidence, self assured people. And, at times, I have been accused of "lacking confidence". However, in reality, I don't lack confidence in my abilities to do things or get things done. But, I don't understand the cockiness and phony self assuredness that I see all around. Sorry, I don't know everything about everything. Nor, do I control all the circumstances. I can control myself and what I can control to the extent that I can control. But, I really find people nowadays to be so cocky and cock sure about what they think they know or will do, when you don't know what God or nature or life has in store for you. Thoughts?

I think that this attitude that we can control whatever happens to us is part of the individualistic societies many of us live in. From childhood we are told we are in control of our lives and unless major life events such as serious illness/divorce of parents/death of loved ones etc intervene, we reach adulthood with this belief intact. It takes major life events and life experience to show us how powerless we often are. I agree with you, that none of us know what is heading our way and that assuming that we are in control is, to a large extent, foolish. We may have some degree of control over how we react to events, but this is about all.
A lot of the confidence which people display is a front only. Behind the mask many of them are as scared as the rest of us.

 

[dd11]

“We do not know one millionth of one percent about anything.” (Thomas Edison)

I find that people who are overly cocky tend also to not really be that bright. Kind of like the "ignorance is bliss" thing. And, looking at the world around us, I am amazed at how easy it is for people to simply tune out all the suffer and tragedy all around them. Yes, we need to find ways to be happy in the midst of what is going in the world. But, I think there are many more Pollyanna types who simply just refuse to see because it is much more fun having your nose in your phone 24/7 and playing candy crush, lol.

 

[Despicable Me]

People like confidence, self assured people. And, at times, I have been accused of "lacking confidence". However, in reality, I don't lack confidence in my abilities to do things or get things done. But, I don't understand the cockiness and phony self assuredness that I see all around. Sorry, I don't know everything about everything. Nor, do I control all the circumstances. I can control myself and what I can control to the extent that I can control. But, I really find people nowadays to be so cocky and cock sure about what they think they know or will do, when you don't know what God or nature or life has in store for you. Thoughts?

Humanity is very fragile. Everyone is fragile and they know they are fragile.
Confidence is that cloak that some people love to wear because it not only hides their own fragility but it hides the fragility of those around them, too.
People become absorbed into this veil, this illusion, just as anyone might become absorbed into a book of fantasy, or a movie about magic or love, or any video game. It's all the same thing really, an escape from reality.

It is that illusion that all is right with the world, and that all things will be right.

Most people cannot let go of this illusion because if they do, they become like many here on this forum... Lonely, insecure, and vulnerable.

The realists, if there even are such a thing, are the people who look at all of this and see that these delusions are merely just the reflection of humanity's fear, the fear that human society itself has yet to overcome.
So it's simply just me, and simply just you, and simply just any human being. Afraid of everything we cannot prevent, afraid of our own mortality, afraid of who and what we really are. That is reality minus the delusions of confidence and ego.

It is not a very pretty picture, and that is why we all hide from it. Some more than others.

 

[Solivagant]

“We do not know one millionth of one percent about anything.” (Thomas Edison)

^ Reminds me of this: The Dunning-Kruger Effect