Dislike your own appearance in some circumstances?

[Iceman1978]

It's kind of like a Catch-22 I guess, building confidence that is. Part of building confidence in yourself is that you're around people who treat you well, but when you're around people who tear you down how can you feel good about yourself. It's like dealing with abuse. An abuser will tear a victim down over and over and over until they feel like they're worthless. So how are they to build confidence?

Part of the issue with me is that I feel like nobody ever encouraged me when I was younger. I was always made to feel like I didn't matter, and so I turned inward and became very introverted. I've been called ugly and had women criticize my appearance on more than one occasion in my life, and this only made the situation worse. That part of it started when I was just 16, so it makes me feel as though I was robbed of having a normal life.

People have often treated me like an idiot as well, even though a lot of what I've predicted in terms of geopolitics and economics over the years has turned out to be right. I said as early as 2002 that the global economy was heading for major trouble and people brushed me aside like what I had to say was irrelevant. Well, I think we all know how that went by 2007-2008.

 

[Bluey]

It's kind of like a Catch-22 I guess, building confidence that is. Part of building confidence in yourself is that you're around people who treat you well, but when you're around people who tear you down how can you feel good about yourself. It's like dealing with abuse. An abuser will tear a victim down over and over and over until they feel like they're worthless. So how are they to build confidence?

Part of the issue with me is that I feel like nobody ever encouraged me when I was younger. I was always made to feel like I didn't matter, and so I turned inward and became very introverted. I've been called ugly and had women criticize my appearance on more than one occasion in my life, and this only made the situation worse. That part of it started when I was just 16, so it makes me feel as though I was robbed of having a normal life.

People have often treated me like an idiot as well, even though a lot of what I've predicted in terms of geopolitics and economics over the years has turned out to be right. I said as early as 2002 that the global economy was heading for major trouble and people brushed me aside like what I had to say was irrelevant. Well, I think we all know how that went by 2007-2008.

Those girls that called you ugly. Was they blind?
But for real. kids can be cruel. I was teased no end at school.
Walking around a school with a limp with a 1000 kids at that school I got my fair share of teasing.
I have seen 2 picks of you. And no way are you ugly. Far from it even someone else said you looked like someone out of a film. A good looking guy.

Maybe you to suffer with Dysmorphic Disorder?
Maybe other people in this tread that understand that disorder could advice you on that?
Maybe you would also bennerfit from a bit of therapy?
Sometimes in therapy you only have to go a hand full of times and its enough. Worth a try I would say.

And I have seen you debate. There is also no way your an idiot.
But I think you already have worked that one out that your a pretty smart guy.

 

[Iceman1978]

Thanks Bluey,

I've always loved history and economics, along with other subjects. In college I actually did a term paper on the Cold War for one of my history classes. Then in sociology I did a term paper on post WW2 and it's impact on society, language and economics.

 

[Bluey]

Well that would explain your knowledge. Which BTW is much better then mine..

 

[Iceman1978]

Well that would explain your knowledge. Which BTW is much better then mine..

One thing that my parents did tell me is that part of the reason my peers were so cruel was because of jealousy. Not sure if I believe that or not.

 

[Bluey]

Well that would explain your knowledge. Which BTW is much better then mine..

One thing that my parents did tell me is that part of the reason my peers were so cruel was because of jealousy. Not sure if I believe that or not.

That probobly is true.
There is nothing weirs then jealousy.

Dont let them keep you in the past.
Find away to move on from it. Some peopled spend all there lives trying to get over stuff that happened in there childhood.
Your not there now and your never going back.
And to what I could see you got a cool mo-fo job as well

 

[Iceman1978]

That probobly is true.
There is nothing weirs then jealousy.

Dont let them keep you in the past.
Find away to move on from it. Some peopled spend all there lives trying to get over stuff that happened in there childhood.
Your not there now and your never going back.
And to what I could see you got a cool mo-fo job as well

I love my job!!!

Someone once asked me what it was like to go on a search-and-rescue (SAR) mission. I told them about one where we had to go through rough seas and almost ten-foot waves and heavy rain. They asked me if that scares me and I was like "no way..we live for those moments"

 

[Zook]

That bit made me lol.
At lest you have a sense of humor

Maybe you have got Body Dysmorphic Disorder.
I dont know anything about that. So its not something I would understand.

Have you tried seeing a professional to talk about it?
It could be something thats coursing this from your past. If you are able to find the reason why maybe you can start looking at yourself has everyone else dose.
Which I would say is a very good looking young guy in the prime of his life.
Yes 36 is still young. I am 41, and I am going to keep telling myself that I am still young

I've tried therapy many times. It never works. They tell me nothing I don't already know myself.

36 is pretty young, I guess. I just feel old

Well, I guess you would be wrong on your stats, because that's not why I think I'm not that good looking.
Like Zook, I also have BDD, but probably not as severe as him. I have NEVER been told I'm ugly. I know my opinion of myself is not shared by others, but what I see and what they see are two entirely different people.

You're lucky. I've been told I'm ugly more times than I care to remember.

 

[Iceman1978]

Well, I guess you would be wrong on your stats, because that's not why I think I'm not that good looking.
Like Zook, I also have BDD, but probably not as severe as him. I have NEVER been told I'm ugly. I know my opinion of myself is not shared by others, but what I see and what they see are two entirely different people.

You're lucky. I've been told I'm ugly more times than I care to remember.

As have I. Many times.