Foreign student - loneliness

[xvanityfairx]

Hey! everyone

I have the same problem as Perle. I'm a foreign student in France (I come from Finland) and i just dont seem to find any new friends. I try to talk to people and see if they could hang out. But i find myself always alone. Im alone after lessons, during the weekends and short 3 days holidays (weekend plus one work day). And i dont know what to do. It kills me to not have anywhere to go and to not have people to meet. I can go out, but it is always by myself. I can go to a café and its always by myself..... Everyone in my UNI already has a friend because they've lived in France and Paris their whole lives...
What should i do? Please give me some advice.

 

[trZ]

Approach people, be open, be yourself. It will be hit n miss but the more people you approach the easier you will make friends. I truly know this is easier said than done, but you just have to suck it up and do it, and it will pay of tremendously!

 

[xvanityfairx]

I have been trying to do that. I've tried to talk to a lot of people and every time its the same story....

 

[trZ]

Don't let misses get to you. Just keep on going. If you do, you will have a very lonely year. If you are a introvert person in general, this could be a turnaround. If you can just keep on going you will have success, and you will become more socially skilled (if you lack any at all). Trust me, walking around and not talking to anyone wont bring you any friends - The chances of someone approaching you is pretty small in europe.

 

[Divzro]

If they have Gaming Cafes in France, you check out the scene. Gamers tend to be friends with anyone who plays the same game as them.

 

[dead]

I have been trying to do that. I've tried to talk to a lot of people and every time its the same story....

Hyvää yötä

xvanityfairx, i'm sorry to hear you are having such a lonely time :/
the only advice i can offer - is to be friendly, and open, and to try and hang in there.

i hope things get better soon for you :/

also... i know this is not really of much help. but we are here.
i cannot tell you just how much this has helped me while i was going through similar times. and i suppose, still am.

 

[carina6192]

i was just wondering.... what kind of environment do you live in? is your house generally clean or messy? this can make a difference in how you feel

 

[cheaptrickfan]

i was just wondering.... what kind of environment do you live in? is your house generally clean or messy? this can make a difference in how you feel

I was just wondering why are you c&ping the same thing over and over.

Can we expect a link to a cleaning product or organizational system in one of your next posts?

 

[xvanityfairx]

Thank you for all the posts!
Yes, i am trying to be more sociable, getting friends has never been a problem for me and i guess for that reason having friends slowly is difficult. The environment here is just different than what im used to. I used to be a lot in an international community and coming to people who have lived in one place their whole lives; having already their own group of friends and etc its just difficult.
I watch my other friends partying in the UK and i feel that i made a mistake coming to Paris....

(And yes, my places is pretty clean. )

 

[cheaptrickfan]

(And yes, my places is pretty clean. )

Well thank goodness for that!


Welcome, by the way.

 

[amuraka]

hello,i read about your story, i have the same problem, iam from lithuania but i study in italy,for me it's also so difficult to find friends here,i notice that it's more simple to communicate with another foreign students, who are in the same situation as me, i think the problem is that such countries like italy and france have specific people, and not everybody is able to adapt theirself, locals do not accept the different attitute, different culture like you do in north o in my country, the only way, on my opinion, to find friends to become like them(but it's stupid coz you are the way you are..)if somebody has another opinion i would like to hear it..

 

[CrazieCute]

Like attracts like. People you are not compatible with will never be real friends. Watch, observe and read people. When you find someone who is like you reach out and try. Don't give away pieces of your soul to those who will not cherish it.


btw take the time alone to really get to know yourself. Know yourself and you will know a real friend when you meet them.