On being quiet

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Lola91

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I've always been a quiet person. Generally this fluctuates in different situations. I find that I get very quiet in moving vehicles. Trains, buses, cars.
I even like to drive in complete silence a lot of the time. It seems to bother people a lot but I have also found that staying quiet in any situation generally bothers people.

If I have nothing to say, I say nothing. And most people speak when they generally have nothing relevant to say.

Eating is another thing. I hate talking while eating.

By the way this quietness isn't related to social anxiety or shyness. I'm completely comfortable most times and yet remain silent.

Any others like this? I'm sure there are...



*crickets*
 
I'm not naturally quiet...not at all. lol Although, the times I have nothing to say, I will remain quiet and have no issues with it at all. Yes, people who will be dumbfounded by this, it DOES happen. Not often, but it does. :p

I REALLY despise talking while eating.
 
I am also generally quiet if I have nothing substantial to say. However, my level of talkativeness depends on the situation. If I think I can add to a conversation, I'm more than willing to join in, but silence doesn't bother me.

My only issue with talking while eating is that, if it's two people, at least one person isn't eating. But if I'm out with someone, the coordination between eating and talking is a bit of a social skill, I think.
 
I took a girl on a date to a nice restaurant.
She liked to chat. Me, I'm a quiet type. i do talk but I do not babble (unless I'm drunk).
When the food arrived, I figured her conversation would break to allow for food consumption.
Wrong.
She kept on chattin' away, despite a forkful food in mouth. I could see the food being chomped and diced inside her mouth as she kept on smiling and chatting.
The biggest turn off I've ever experienced.
Never saw her again after that date.
 
Silence doesn't bother me either. I talk when I don't feel like a bother (or a bore) but when I'm around strangers I'm trying to be as undisturbing as humanely possible.

I do like filling the void with music when I get the chance, but I'm used to just sitting around in silence.
 
Quiet is my middle name, most people think I'm mute or something, especially at work. I just like to talk only when I have something of substance to say, that's all.
 
I'm glad that most share my view on eating while talking.

And lol @ABrokenMan that must have been disgusting.

Seeker2.0
I totally relate. I don't see it as a flaw at all though. I like my quietness. It's something that I've changed a bit over the years (as I said, could make other uncomfortable) and attempted to assimilate and be "normal". So now when I randomly get into my quietness people find it more
odd that I could be talkative some times then completely silent for no apparent reason. They assume something must be wrong or that I'm sad. Oh well
 
Listening is a bit of a lost art. A person can go a long way in life by just keeping his ears open. And it's really hard to listen while talking. That's why, after decades of having the bad habit of needing to "express myself," I classically conditioned myself to keep my mouth shut and just listen to what other people have to say. Most people are thrilled when they get an opportunity to dominate the conversation, especially when they can talk endlessly about themselves.

But on a forum such as this one, the talker-listener dynamic doesn't really exist the way it does in face-to-face conversation, so I still "express myself" quite a bit.
 
Lola91 said:
I've always been a quiet person. Generally this fluctuates in different situations. I find that I get very quiet in moving vehicles. Trains, buses, cars.
I even like to drive in complete silence a lot of the time. It seems to bother people a lot but I have also found that staying quiet in any situation generally bothers people.

If I have nothing to say, I say nothing. And most people speak when they generally have nothing relevant to say.

Eating is another thing. I hate talking while eating.

By the way this quietness isn't related to social anxiety or shyness. I'm completely comfortable most times and yet remain silent.

Any others like this? I'm sure there are...

I am SO much like this!

I'm generally a quiet person, and I don't do small talk very well so usually I'd just be quiet. I can talk with people I feel comfortable with, and even strangers, I have no social anxiety like that, but again there are moments where I just go silent and I don't think there is anything wrong with this. But I know what you mean, people have found me "boring" for being this way. Oh well. Yes, I've been told to my face that I'm a bore.

I also don't talk much while I'm eating. I'm perfectly fine with a silent meal lol. Perhaps occasionally commenting on the food and that's about it. :p

Don't worry, you're not alone on this. Neither are you wrong or bad for being this way.
 
I spend a great deal of my time with silence.. or with nothing more than the clacking of my keyboard as I type... and the white noise generated by my floor fan... But other than that, utter silence for hours on end... Like many here, I don't much speak unless I have something worth hearing to say.
 
I love the stillness of the dawn; except the occasional bark from an urban fox marking our his territory. Before starting work I sit quietly in our conservatory and sip tea. For me, these moments of quietude are often the best part of the day.
 
Lola91 said:
I've always been a quiet person. Generally this fluctuates in different situations. I find that I get very quiet in moving vehicles. Trains, buses, cars.
I even like to drive in complete silence a lot of the time. It seems to bother people a lot but I have also found that staying quiet in any situation generally bothers people.

If I have nothing to say, I say nothing. And most people speak when they generally have nothing relevant to say.

Eating is another thing. I hate talking while eating.

By the way this quietness isn't related to social anxiety or shyness. I'm completely comfortable most times and yet remain silent.

Any others like this? I'm sure there are...



*crickets*

I love quiet people. I think most people talk too much and don't listen enough. It disturbs me when I am expected to be communicative when I am not in the mood. I would be more than happy to hang around people who talked less!
 
Lola91 said:
I find that I get very quiet in moving vehicles. Trains, buses, cars.

Eating is another thing. I hate talking while eating.

Me too on both counts there.

I find it difficult to make chit chat because I only like to speak when I have something to say. It's not difficult for me to have a conversation with someone I know, but I'm no good at initiating it.

If someone sits next to me on public transport, I try not to make eye contact because I don't want them talking to me. I know that sounds silly but I just want to be left in peace haha

People assume I am shy because I am quiet, but I am not. I just like to observe first and decide whether I want to get to know someone first.

Can't stand those people that talk incessantly about nothing. Anything that pops into their brains, comes out of their mouths. These are the types I generally try to avoid.
 
i enjoy not talking. I think better and learn more that way. I am super uncomfortable on webcam. Not because people see me its because i have to speak cleary.
 
Yay quiet people lol. I have always accepted this part of me. Thank you all for your responses. I also really like quiet people. There is something calming about remaining quiet and just taking in your surroundings.

And yes! Listening is something people don't do anymore. I can't count how many times I've been speaking with someone and while I'm talking I can see they are not actually listening. I call them out all the time too. It's doesn't help though.
 
My social life is an unbalanced one for sure, as far as my demeanor goes. I can be very outgoing with a select few people in my life, or when I feel comfortable enough with the people around me, I'll just keep going, I love a good conversation. Despite that, I'm mostly silent in most social situations, to the point where people seem to think I'm either slow or up to something. I always find myself farther away from the group as if I subconsciously put myself there, knowing I probably won't feel like I belong regardless.

I'll be silent when I'm by myself, but eventually I'll think of something funny and I'll decide to say it out loud just for my own amusement. Talking to myself, awwww yeah, totally not insane haha
 

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