Whats the dumbest thing you have ever done when intoxicated?

[Naleena]

The dumbest thing I ever did when intoxicated was:

I was at Karaoke and a guy started singing Baby Got back and gyrating his hips. Everyone was laughing at the exagerated way he was moving! In jest, I got up and took a dollar bill up on stage to put under his belt. I ended up tripping and falling on him!!!!! He grabbed me and started laughing. I guess neither one of us will ever forget that one...lol

 

[Blue2008]

Um *very embarrassed* I went to watch the Chip n Dale strippers with friends on Valentines day about 20 yrs ago. Well they raffled one guy off at the end of the night to be on stage with to remove his G-string. Well I did with my teeth. Yes guys I was very gentle, but I had my eyes closed. Dummy me. lol

 

[Naleena]

Um *very embarrassed* I went to watch the Chip n Dale strippers with friends on Valentines day about 20 yrs ago. Well they raffled one guy off at the end of the night to be on stage with to remove his G-string. Well I did with my teeth. Yes guys I was very gentle, but I had my eyes closed. Dummy me. lol

RFLMAO!!!! I would have liked to seen that! You closed your eyes?

 

[Irishdoll]

I don't drink, so this is many years ago, while trying to fit in. I was 16 (oops) and I was on a blind double date. They had bought a bottle of Mad Dog for my girlfriend and myself. We went to a deserted (really bumpy) part of a lake. My friend passed out early on and I started drinking her bottle. Well, it was late and they couldn't take us home like that. My friends guy had a crazy friend living nearby. (He thought he was Roscoe P. Coltrain from the Dukes Of Hazard.) Anyhoo, I must have thrown up 5 times before we got there. And, when we did, I managed to stumble into a tree, walk into this guys house, ask to use his couch and pass out.When I woke up, there was a plane flying right overhead. I thought I had the worst hangover in history. Needless to say, that's one reason I don't drink anymore.

 

[Porman]

ah drunken stories are good.

i remember getting absolutely wasted at the pub, felt fine until i got into a friends mums car, then i let loose in the back seat lol, felt so bad. came home and kept spewing up, went to bed finally with a bucket, get outa bed, start spewing up again all the way to midday called in sick to work saying i got food piosoning lol. that was one of the first times out on the piss. Iv learnt how to drink since then hehe

 

[Blue2008]

RFLMAO!!!! I would have liked to seen that! You closed your eyes?

Yup, I was spinning and had to keep my balance, so I closed my eyes. To many Alabama Slammers. Dummy me He had a long coat to cover up with, so when I opened my eyes he was covered. But smiling I was told by his manager I was the only one they ever saw do that. All the other women just grabbed the G-string and pulled them down.

 

[Antihero]

Dream and think about how things should be. Sorry, I know that's boring.

 

[Fodderboy]

This was back when I was still fun to hang out with, I was at a fencing event (*war... SCA... Like a big renaissance faire, with a lot more fighting) ... But instead of swordfighting, I'd spent most of the day with a bottle of whisky... Night rolled around and some of the people in my group took me (I was easily lead around at this point) and dressed me up like a wench (bodice, skirt, and a shawl to cover my face)...

All dressed up, they got me another beer and took me to the belly dancer party... I danced for a while, then they took me over to introduce me to the guy running the Harem... I guess as far as being a woman goes, I'm good from far but far from good, lol =0)... By this point the bodice was killing me so I convinced them to take it off, then I tied my shirt up like a REAL belly dancer. .

Some guys came along and sat with us for a while, one of them turns to me and says "You know, the leper colony is holding an Ugly Toga Party right about now, I would love to walk in there with you on my arm." How could I say no?

We made our way over to the Leper Colony's camp site... On the way, this lady threw beer at me then offered to lick it off.... I got scared and ran... Eventually we found the Lepers, but the Ugly Toga Party had just ended... The people there said they wish I'd gotten there earlier, cause I would have done well (I guess the winner was a girl in a plastic wrap toga... **** shame I missed that one)... But they told me if I wanted, I could still use the catwalk... So I did my best supermodel strut through a line of tiki torches, on my way back some lady came and jumped on me... I made some humpy-humpy motions and dropped her (she was throwing off my groove, lol)...

We made our way back to our own camp,so I could refill (I've got a "Bubba Keg" ... It's like a 64oz coffee mug that I filled up with a little bit of everything I had in my ice chest... Sorta like my boatswain's whistle drink I posted a while back) After that, we found the royal beer-tasting(or whatever they called it) festival... Some guy passed me a ziplock bag full of some misery liquid... He was calling it his colostomy bag... I drank some, then gave him a hit of my bubba keg...

... After that, everything is a blur... But I woke up the next morning in my own tent ontop of my sleeping bag, in a pool of my own vomit... The inside of the sleeping bag was still relatively dry, so I stripped off all of the puke clothes from the night before, got in the sleeping bag and went back to bed... When I finally felt awake enough to get up a few hours later, I found my glasses, cleaned them off, and had a good look at my tent... It looked like I was spinning around and vomiting at the same time, because it covered 360 degrees. Luckily, my duffel bag was closed, so at least I had some clothes that escaped my wrath...

I did my best to kind of soak up the mess, put on some clean-ish clothes and stumbled out of my tent on my way to get to the showers... There was a small group of people sitting on the picnic table in my camp, they applauded as I picked myself up out of the dirt. One of them patted me on the back and said: "Congratulations, Jeffy, you're a real pirate now" ... "Please, go shower"

 

[Oceanmist23]

LOL Fodderboy that sounds like a loooooooooooong night I believe my dumbest while intoxicated moment fades greatly in comparison lol
I was at the pub with my co-workers at the time, and after X number of beers my mate, who's equally sloshed, asks me what my favourite sex position was. Me, very stupidly, tells him and I don't think much about for the rest of the night. The next morning however all I can think of is what if my mate gets drunk again and lets all our other co-workers know! He never did, but I don't know if I should invite him to my future wedding... lol

Edit: In case anyone was wondering.... NO I did NOT sleep with him LOL wtf?!?!
He's 39 years old and attracted to busty redheads with freckles lmao

 

[Chris 2]

umm...I never ever got intoxicated

 

[Fodderboy]

...my mate, who's equally sloshed, asks me what my favourite sex position was. Me, very stupidly, tells him and I don't think much about for the rest of the night.

LOL! What is the use of a friend that would let you live that down... I think my nickname would be "self inflicted donkey punch" for the rest of my life... =0)

 

[Fodderboy]

umm...I never ever got intoxicated

Come on over, dude... I've got legos and a liquor cabinet...

 

[Oceanmist23]

...my mate, who's equally sloshed, asks me what my favourite sex position was. Me, very stupidly, tells him and I don't think much about for the rest of the night.

LOL! What is the use of a friend that would let you live that down... I think my nickname would be "self inflicted donkey punch" for the rest of my life... =0)

Lol he's alright really, and he doesn't wear velcro shoes...

 

[fadingaway22]

I have two humiliating drunk stories. Both are equally embarrasing. The first one involved tequila shots. I was at a party at my friends, and we were doing tequila slammers. It was during the summer, and I was wearing a pair of loose shorts. After about 5 shots, I was outside in his backyard. His backyard was located on a steep incline. Apparently, my shorts had became too loose and they fell down to my ankles. Due to a lack of motor skills, I tumbled down the hill when I tried to bend over and pick up my shorts. So, I rolled down this steep hill, half naked, colliding into a prickly bush. Ouch.

The second drunk story involves the time I had went to a bar during lunch hours. I only had a few beers and I wasn't actually drunk. I was a pedestrian that day because my car was getting worked on. I figured I would have a few beers, walk to the local movie theater to watch a movie, and then my car would be done. Halfway down the road to the movie theater, I had to relieve myself. After looking to see if there was no one around, I snuck between two bushes and started to relieve myself. To my surprise, an undercover cop in an unmarked cruiser noticed my " draining". I booked. I took off and ran through a path in the woods. The cop was actually on the other side of the road when his lights flashed, giving me ample time to escape. Luckily, I evaded his efforts. That would have been an embarrasing story on COPS.

Anyways, alcohol makes people do stupid things. I am an example of this.

 

[Estreen]

I've been drunk, but I'm always quite alert, but these are some pretty funny stories guys.

 

[Bluey]

To much dumb ass honeysuckle

 

[samba101]

I have so many drunk stories not embarrassed about them now. Can't quite remember them but I know they're there.

 

[wolfshadow]

I fell asleep and wet myself in a friends car. The memory still makes me wince. That isn't actually THE dumbest thing I've ever done whilst sozzled but it's the dumbest thing that I'm prepared to share with Joe public :shy:

 

[Greensoul]

OMG...These stories are all so awesome, some I guess were embarrassing, but right now to me they all rock.
I got drunk once too. I was at a New Year's Eve Party with a whole load of friends at a cabin. There was this one girl which I kinda liked though not that much. She got drunk...and I mean seriously...and started telling how wasted she was and how she didn't want to have sex, because when she would wake up the next morning she would regret it completely. I was slightly more sober than her I guess so I thought I'd look after her. She invited me outside and we took a walk. At a certain point she jumped in the snow and told me to do the same. And we laid there...under the stars, in the snow and honestly that was one of the best moments of my life; the apparent stupidity, yet the spontaneity and the simplicity of it made me learn its value. We finally went back to the cabin and we stood outside, talking. I told her that I sort of liked her, from the first picture I saw 3 prior, which was actually true. Amazingly, she smiled. From the next morning and up till now she hasn't really spoken to me and I guess she's trying to avoid me. Somehow I feel really dumb about that night because I guessed I've estranged someone, but at the same times I'm happy that I was honest to both someone else and to my feelings. (Stupid story, I Know)

 

[GHOSTNYOURMIST]

It was at my house on New Years several years back, I had a huge party and invited all my friends. They both showed up! We decided to cook some shrimp on the back deck that wasn't finished yet, I could have swore I built it 20ft long instead of 18ft so I walked off the end and fell on my face, then we decided to set off some fireworks and I ended up setting the deck on fire, one of my friends grabbed a bucket and ran to the stream to get water, he fell in face first, the water was only 3 inches deep but he was so drunk he couldn't roll over so we all jumped in to save him. Everybody was wet so we stripped to our boxers and carried water to put out the fire, then the cops showed up, 3 drunk men in their boxers in the middle of winter cooking shrimp on a smoldering deck didn't make much of a first impression, it's a good thing my brother is a cop or we would have all went to jail. The bad thing is the neighbors had watched the whole thing and haven't let me forget about it to this day. Every New Years they all ask if I remember the time I burned my deck down and got handcuffed by the cops.