Almost engaged...

[dreamer8]

I'm an oldie around here,I joined almost a year ago...
I took a six month hiatus,did some soul searching,found a job that made me uber busy,which coincedentally made me forget about how single I was (as did the money I was earning cha-*******-ching).

Anyway,I had a crazy semester in school, and through it all I found someone in the process. We've been dating for a bit and he bought a ring! The only minor set back is that he's in California right now.

He's picked up a second job,and I'm saving up so we can live together out here. He's bought a ring,family wants to meet me...life is good.

I can say for sure I'm not lonely anymore.

 

[Naleena]

Congradulations on your engagement.

 

[SophiaGrace]

That's great. I wish you happiness.

 

[Badjedidude]

Sounds awesome.

 

[Sean]

Sounds amazing,

Best of luck with your future partner .

 

[Punisher]

 

[evanescencefan91]

hey that's great dreamer 8 I'm glad things are going well and I hope they continue to go well

i like your icon by the way I had a friend in highschool that had a t shirt that said that and he would wear nearly everyday

 

[SherryGee]

congratulations!!

 

[Tramp]

Congratulations, brought a smile to my face. Good luck.

 

[LGH1288]

Hi dreamer8 -- Sounds great! But, I'm a bit confused by the "almost" part; when will it be official? Is something pending? Best wishes to you, LG

 

[suckaG]

best of luck to you, dreamer!

 

[Thrasymachus]

I doubt this is good. So you say you are/were very socially isolated, and are so relieved you found one person that now you are getting hitched? Without having put yourself out there much I doubt you could have found someone compatible so quick. Also if you have not met his parents yet how serious of a relationship could it have been?

Unlike others on this forum, I do not think it is healthy to cheerlead for unhealthy choices like hasty long-term relationships or to fake encourage isolated people that would post here by offering yourself as e-internet friend as if it was a solution. I could be wrong, but I don't see how most isolated people who don't put themselves out much could find themselves a compatible match in six months of not posting here. Have you considered just the easier to exit step of living together first? The fact that you two want to go straight to engagement sends red flags that you are desperate and scared of being alone again more than anything else.

 

[LGH1288]

ITA with Thrasymachus. I was being much too polite by posting that I was confused about the "almost" part; something didn't sit quite right. LG

 

[Thrasymachus]

What is ITA? "I totally agree"? Why create unnecessary confusion.

I will just tell a little about my mother, as far as I know my mom was socially isolated growing up. Not as much as me, but she never had many friends, knew how to meet people, gain friends, put herself out enough to get boyfriends. She was introduced to my father by a fellow Greek immigrant from the same tiny Greek village as her. My father left us when I was five and I have never really seen him since. However, recently he tried to come back into our lives and so as an adult I got to know him. Essentially he is a sweet talker, a bullshitter with no follow through that heaps lies upon lies that are easy to spot and expose. Meeting him helped me realize exactly what kind of epic loser my mom was/is that she could fall for his deceptions.

Basically as far as I can tell my mom could have been this thread starter dreamer8. My dad's character has not changed at all, he left us over two decades ago to hang out with his vapid friends, do drugs, gamble and be a general flake incapable of dealing with the demands of family life. The only way my mom could not have seen through him is because she was an isolated, lonely woman who rather than face her fear of being alone, jumped at whatever was there into a long term relationship which led to a failed marriage and a broken home that resulted in two dysfunctional scarred kids who still cannot recover.

Don't do a foolish thing like jump at whatever is infront of you now because you are too scared of being alone. Being alone, alone, is better than being alone but still in a marriage(pretty common) and alone + divorced(even more common). I live with my family still and I feel totally alone, worse perhaps than having my own place, since I know I cannot talk them about anything so I have to gal-avant around web-forums.

 

[LGH1288]

Hello Thrasymachus -- To answer the initial question in your post, click this link for the definition of ITA. To resolve a similar question I had concerning an acronym you had used in your post (from a closed thread), I found the meaning of PUA at this link. IMO, thanks to the abundance of internet resources available, neither one of us will ever need to suffer the intolerable inconvenience of any "unnecessary confusion". Merry Christmas! LG

 

[ChiCowboy]

Brought a smile to my face, as well. Congrats and the best of luck.