anonymous sexual encounters......

[scott69]

Does anyone else have casual anonymous sex with strangers and afterwards fell extreme guilt from it? I'm not defending or condoning this behavior but if it weren't for Craigslist I would never have sex.....
Most of the men I have sex with lead a double life and are married with kids.

 

[Jesse]

43 views and no replies, ok I'll talk about it.

No I don't have casual anonymous sex with strangers, except for one instant in my life which I do regret I had drank quite a bit, quite a bit. I never want that to happen again.

 

[Naval_Fluff]

No but I do jack off and feel guilty about it, like I just cheated on someone.

 

[EveWasFramed]

Does anyone else have casual anonymous sex with strangers and afterwards fell extreme guilt from it? I'm not defending or condoning this behavior but if it weren't for Craigslist I would never have sex.....
Most of the men I have sex with lead a double life and are married with kids.

Well, I wasn't going to post because I don't have any experiences to add, but since Jesse posted, I will too.

I wonder what some of the reasons are that one does, or does not, feel guilt from casual anonymous sex? Is it a moral dilemma? Is it because your parents/family/friends/religious group said it's wrong?
Does anyone who engages in anonymous sex feel that it's their body, that they should be able to do with it as they please, so they feel no guilt at all?
And wow, Scott. Do you have any knowledge as to why a lot of them are leading double lives? Are they bisexual? Or are they not comfortable in with their sexual oreientation? Perhaps pressure from family or society to conform to some preconceived notion about what is acceptable?
All very interesting questions.
I don't want to hijack the thread or anything, so if these questions are too far off topic, please let me know! I am curious however.

---

No but I do jack off and feel guilty about it, like I just cheated on someone.

Nothin' wrong with self love, lol!

But seriously...in my opinion, there is nothing to feel guilty about, Fluffers. I mean, c'mon...it feels good, you can't catch anything, you can't get anyone pregnant, and it doesn't cost anything!! lol Where is the harm??
*shrugs* I wonder if it's partly due to the attitude or beliefs of whoever raises you. Is guilt something that is instilled by our parent(s)?

 

[scott69]

Does anyone else have casual anonymous sex with strangers and afterwards fell extreme guilt from it? I'm not defending or condoning this behavior but if it weren't for Craigslist I would never have sex.....
Most of the men I have sex with lead a double life and are married with kids.

Well, I wasn't going to post because I don't have any experiences to add, but since Jesse posted, I will too.

I wonder what some of the reasons are that one does, or does not, feel guilt from casual anonymous sex? Is it a moral dilemma? Is it because your parents/family/friends/religious group said it's wrong?
Does anyone who engages in anonymous sex feel that it's their body, that they should be able to do with it as they please, so they feel no guilt at all?
And wow, Scott. Do you have any knowledge as to why a lot of them are leading double lives? Are they bisexual? Or are they not comfortable in with their sexual oreientation? Perhaps pressure from family or society to conform to some preconceived notion about what is acceptable?
All very interesting questions.
I don't want to hijack the thread or anything, so if these questions are too far off topic, please let me know! I am curious however.

Most are gay and were when they married.... they thought being married would "make them straight" I feel it also has a lot to do with the individuals upbringing
religion, family and social class etc....
Also the anonymous part helps ease their guilt and camouflage the anxiety they must be feeling.... these men are definitely "on the down low" and most people would be shocked at how wide spread this is... just read your local craigslist ads "men seeking men" and you will see most are married and stress how careful they have to be.

 

[EveWasFramed]

Yes, I imagine that a lot of marriages wouldn't stand up to that kind of pressure. And it's sad that, for whatever reasons, they have to live their day to day lives as someone they really aren't.

 

[Jesse]

I wonder what some of the reasons are that one does, or does not, feel guilt from casual anonymous sex? Is it a moral dilemma? Is it because your parents/family/friends/religious group said it's wrong?

For me it's not a moral dilemma or because someone has told me it's wrong. It's because I've always wanted a girlfriend; I'm more of a relationship type of person. Something like a one-night stand would remind me (and in the one case did) that I'm still alone and I don't want to form a relationship based on sex.

No but I do jack off and feel guilty about it, like I just cheated on someone.

Nothin' wrong with self love, lol!

But seriously...in my opinion, there is nothing to feel guilty about, Fluffers. I mean, c'mon...it feels good, you can't catch anything, you can't get anyone pregnant, and it doesn't cost anything!! lol Where is the harm??
*shrugs* I wonder if it's partly due to the attitude or beliefs of whoever raises you. Is guilt something that is instilled by our parent(s)?

I don't think there's anything wrong with self love, but it can mess you up in certain situations.

 

[DakotaDesert]

Don't feel guilty. You are doing nothing wrong. You hurt nobody. Your life is yours, not other people life. You are the only one who can and has to decide for yourself. Really, there is nothing to be ashame of or to feel guilty about.

 

[Punisher]

Does anyone else have casual anonymous sex with strangers and afterwards fell extreme guilt from it? I'm not defending or condoning this behavior but if it weren't for Craigslist I would never have sex.....
Most of the men I have sex with lead a double life and are married with kids.

Don't feel guilty. You are doing nothing wrong. You hurt nobody. Your life is yours, not other people life. You are the only one who can and has to decide for yourself. Really, there is nothing to be ashame of or to feel guilty about.

So i can go shag a load of married women (who arent happy with their marriage for whatever reason) and it's ok?

 

[Estreen]

Does anyone else have casual anonymous sex with strangers and afterwards fell extreme guilt from it? I'm not defending or condoning this behavior but if it weren't for Craigslist I would never have sex.....
Most of the men I have sex with lead a double life and are married with kids.

Don't feel guilty. You are doing nothing wrong. You hurt nobody. Your life is yours, not other people life. You are the only one who can and has to decide for yourself. Really, there is nothing to be ashame of or to feel guilty about.

So i can go shag a load of married women (who arent happy with their marriage for whatever reason) and it's ok?

This poses an interesting question.

 

[Naval_Fluff]

No but I do jack off and feel guilty about it, like I just cheated on someone.

Nothin' wrong with self love, lol!

But seriously...in my opinion, there is nothing to feel guilty about, Fluffers. I mean, c'mon...it feels good, you can't catch anything, you can't get anyone pregnant, and it doesn't cost anything!! lol Where is the harm??
*shrugs* I wonder if it's partly due to the attitude or beliefs of whoever raises you. Is guilt something that is instilled by our parent(s)?

My parents are pretty strict when it comes to sex, and they believe wanking off is the devil I don't feel the same way though. But when I'm in a relationship everytime I try to look at porn a little voice pops up in the back of my head asking "What would she think if she saw you right now?" plus for some reason when I'm dating someone the desire isn't as...frequent >,>

 

[Naleena]

But when I'm in a relationship everytime I try to look at porn a little voice pops up in the back of my head asking "What would she think if she saw you right now?"

She might be wondering why you didn't invite her to watch it with you. Hey, you never know.

 

[GHOSTNYOURMIST]

It's much safer to love thy self than to love thy nieghbor but it's hard to be anonymous when you know your partner like the back of your hand................. because your partner IS your hand.

OK, I'm confused. Who's anonymous hand are we having sex with?

Now, If my nieghbors name was Guilty, sure, I'd feel her.

Hell, it's been so long I'm not sure what sex is anymore.


:club:

 

[Wyrm]

There's nothing wrong with having casual sex, or with jacking off if you've got no one to have sex with. It's human nature and it doesn't hurt anyone (unless it involves cheating, in which case it is a moral dilemma). Pregnancy and stds are what you have to worry about.

I don't think there's anything wrong with self love, but it can mess you up in certain situations.

I guess if someone catches you then it does mess you up . Supposedly men who have done it (sex or jacking off) less often throughout their lives are more likely to develop prostate cancer, and probably have a greater chance of having psychological/emotional frustrations. I think that biologically there are benefits to doing it.

On the other hand, I don't really think there are any benefits at all in not doing it, though some people don't want to because of religious/moral beliefs etc. Well if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna drive out and go pick up a uhhh friend........ jk lol.

 

[Jesse]

There's nothing wrong with having casual sex, or with jacking off if you've got no one to have sex with. It's human nature and it doesn't hurt anyone (unless it involves cheating, in which case it is a moral dilemma). Pregnancy and stds are what you have to worry about.

I don't think there's anything wrong with self love, but it can mess you up in certain situations.

I guess if someone catches you then it does mess you up . Supposedly men who have done it (sex or jacking off) less often throughout their lives are more likely to develop prostate cancer, and probably have a greater chance of having psychological/emotional frustrations. I think that biologically there are benefits to doing it.

On the other hand, I don't really think there are any benefits at all in not doing it, though some people don't want to because of religious/moral beliefs etc. Well if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna drive out and go pick up a uhhh friend........ jk lol.

Actually I was thinking about the negative effects of porn on the mind. Cranking one out might be ok, but doing it to porn can really damage the way you think.

 

[DakotaDesert]

Does anyone else have casual anonymous sex with strangers and afterwards fell extreme guilt from it? I'm not defending or condoning this behavior but if it weren't for Craigslist I would never have sex.....
Most of the men I have sex with lead a double life and are married with kids.

Don't feel guilty. You are doing nothing wrong. You hurt nobody. Your life is yours, not other people life. You are the only one who can and has to decide for yourself. Really, there is nothing to be ashame of or to feel guilty about.

So i can go shag a load of married women (who arent happy with their marriage for whatever reason) and it's ok?

Cheating is not a good thing to do but we have to be realistic. Most of the people who cheat on their wife/husband/gf/bf do it because they are not happy or satisfied with their life or wife/husband/gf/bf. They stay in their relationship for many reasons: kids, financial, love... but they need to be reassured or desired or away from drama for a while or for a moment. Cheating helps them to keep moving and stay mentaly alive. You might think I am wrong but I think I am not too far from the reality. Ask around you. You could be surprised by the answers you will get. Don't get me wrong, I do not promote the cheating, but from my point of view, I think there is always a reason for everything.

 

[Naval_Fluff]

well jacking off to porn can create a mindset that woman are just sexual objects and nothing more, and I never, ever want to think like that. Women get enouh honeysuckle already I don't need to add to it by looking at them like objects. I do my best to respect women in all cases

 

[Punisher]

Does anyone else have casual anonymous sex with strangers and afterwards fell extreme guilt from it? I'm not defending or condoning this behavior but if it weren't for Craigslist I would never have sex.....
Most of the men I have sex with lead a double life and are married with kids.

Don't feel guilty. You are doing nothing wrong. You hurt nobody. Your life is yours, not other people life. You are the only one who can and has to decide for yourself. Really, there is nothing to be ashame of or to feel guilty about.

So i can go shag a load of married women (who arent happy with their marriage for whatever reason) and it's ok?

Cheating is not a good thing to do but we have to be realistic. Most of the people who cheat on their wife/husband/gf/bf do it because they are not happy or satisfied with their life or wife/husband/gf/bf. They stay in their relationship for many reasons: kids, financial, love... but they need to be reassured or desired or away from drama for a while or for a moment. Cheating helps them to keep moving and stay mentaly alive. You might think I am wrong but I think I am not too far from the reality. Ask around you. You could be surprised by the answers you will get. Don't get me wrong, I do not promote the cheating, but from my point of view, I think there is always a reason for everything.

There are reasons for murder, rape, pedophilia etc (i know they're more extreme acts), but no reason can make any of them right, cheating included.

 

[cheaptrickfan]

Does anyone else have casual anonymous sex with strangers and afterwards fell extreme guilt from it? I'm not defending or condoning this behavior but if it weren't for Craigslist I would never have sex.....
Most of the men I have sex with lead a double life and are married with kids.

Don't feel guilty. You are doing nothing wrong. You hurt nobody.

I disagree. Being The Other Person participates directly in an act that does hurt someone: the wife. Yes, these husbands are the ones who are betraying their wives, and the Other Person has no allegiance to a stranger's wife, but this doesn't absolve them of some blame. Our actions do affect people even when we don't intend them to.

I would never want to be party to an act of deception like that. I'd like to think that if I fell in love with a married man, and he'd reciprocated it, that he wouldn't cheapen it by hiding it or by hurting his wife and family. Too many people can get hurt.

 

[Jesse]

I've got to agree with punisher and cheaptrickfan.