Dating websites - do they work ?

[Paraiyar]

Being attracted to the physical characteristics associated with a race isn't racism, it's a preference. Interest based on stereotypes is obviously racist, but that is a separate thought process. Nobody criticizes minorities for wanting to date within their own cultures (or having any other preferences for that matter). Accusations of fetishization (of Asian women), or racism for wanting children that look like you seem to be thrown exclusively at white males. I NEVER hear East Asian, Polynesian, Indian or Arab people accused of this.

10000+

 

[EveWasFramed]

I'm still curious as to what ethnicity the OP tends to message on the dating sites.

 

[MisterLonely]

Word fetish has a negative connotation to me. When used to describe a predilection to a specific race or ethnicity.  That is just my opinion speaking from experience

I can understand that, the word fetish however is never negative, and it sometimes suprises me that such a beautifull word is treated with such ignorance and disrespect of it's actuall meaning (not saying you do this btw).

A fetish is a love, adoration or even fixation on something not usually associated with having such qualities, so in other words when you have a fetish for something, you see beauty where (most) others see the opposite or nothing at all, I find this a very beautifull thing

A word of beauty or not. It's used in the negative when it comes to dating and it's been marred as a "beautiful" word thanks to porn..

Not to all my friend , join me in the rebellion

Drop it already!

So you can reply to me and i'm not allowed to defend my point of view?
Anyway i'll drop it, wasn't my intend to offend!

 

[Tuathaniel]

But you have not even demonstrated that the attraction or your personal rejection is solely based on race/ethnic background, so your racism claim remains baseless either way. I doubt you had multiple people telling that your race is inferior which would be actual racism (which you don't get to redefine) and I doubt your claim that race is the biggest factor across the board even more.

Truth!

 

[Restless soul]

I can understand that, the word fetish however is never negative, and it sometimes suprises me that such a beautifull word is treated with such ignorance and disrespect of it's actuall meaning (not saying you do this btw).

A fetish is a love, adoration or even fixation on something not usually associated with having such qualities, so in other words when you have a fetish for something, you see beauty where (most) others see the opposite or nothing at all, I find this a very beautifull thing

A word of beauty or not. It's used in the negative when it comes to dating and it's been marred as a "beautiful" word thanks to porn..

Not to all my friend , join me in the rebellion

Drop it already!

So you can reply to me and i'm not allowed to defend my point of view?
Anyway i'll drop it, wasn't my intend to offend!

You already did. And you did a great job. And then I said drop it. Great. Glad we still can be friends.  I just had aa bad experience with the word fetish as being using in the negative. So I will keep that word to mean my love for high heels and stockings on women

 

[Restless soul]

Maybe I overreacted. I do that. I am better. My psychologist
(Sombulist) is on this site

 

[Restless soul]

Somnambulist*

 

[Somnambulist]

Maybe I overreacted.  I do that. I am better. My psychologist
(Sombulist) is on this site

LOL

 

[Restless soul]

Maybe I overreacted.  I do that. I am better. My psychologist
(Sombulist) is on this site

LOL

I knew you would like that one

 

[Restless soul]

Sorry, your id is a tough one to remember and spell.
At least now I know what it means

 

[MisterLonely]

Maybe I overreacted.  I do that. I am better. My psychologist
(Sombulist) is on this site

No worries, you overreacted and I got defensive, sometimes people just butt heads.
It truly wsn't my intend to offend, was just making friendly banter

 

[Restless soul]

Maybe I overreacted.  I do that. I am better. My psychologist
(Sombulist) is on this site

No worries, you overreacted and I got defensive, sometimes people just butt heads.
It truly wsn't my intend to offend, was just making friendly banter

Thanks. It's cool

 

[BadGuy]

Oh, and names like "Slippypickle". Yeah.

they were talking about user names on the radio this week 
http://thestir.cafemom.com/love_sex/142150/25_weirdest_most_hilarious_online

 

[GrayAndLonesome]

When you've messaged ladies in the past, whay ethnicities do you prefer?

I had a preference for Asian women, but I have also sent out messages to white/caucasian women and some afr-american women. None responded back to me.

I only had one Cambodian female send me a response, and where we met for coffee, and a week later, dinner. After that, she never responded to my text message. Plus she was a little "thicker" than I've expected, so she wasn't a good pick for me.

I had another female participant on another dating website email me back. We exchanged emails, but never led to any face-to-face date meetings.

But oh well, this is the sad reality of romance of me living in the US.

 

[GrayAndLonesome]

Having a prefference or a "type" is not racism, even if that preffrence/type excludes others based on their ethnicity, by your standard me as a heterosexual male excluding males would be racism too, becuse i'm excluding them based on their sex and not personalities...

Also when someone is solely attracted to a specific race/ethicity thats actually a fetish and is completely normal, different people like different things.

Well, having a preference based on one's race is discriminatory right off the bat. sadly, this kind of honeysuckle happens these days. This is why I'm still single.

Fetish is abnormal!

One shouldn't base one's dating preference on eye color, skin color and hair color. There are other factors that women also should look into rather than one's race or ethnicity.

 

[GrayAndLonesome]

Being attracted to the physical characteristics associated with a race isn't racism, it's a preference. Interest based on stereotypes is obviously racist, but that is a separate thought process. Nobody criticizes minorities for wanting to date within their own cultures (or having any other preferences for that matter). Accusations of fetishization (of Asian women), or racism for wanting children that look like you seem to be thrown exclusively at white males. I NEVER hear East Asian, Polynesian, Indian or Arab people accused of this.

Well, it's racism based on what the media feeds you through movies, commercial/advertisement, and the mainstream agenda.

I never said that I'm throwing accusation at white males. I'm just saying that being a white male, you have a better chance of being less lonely and having a date, rather than being of East Asian ancestry (male that is).

 

[MisterLonely]

Having a prefference or a "type" is not racism, even if that preffrence/type excludes others based on their ethnicity, by your standard me as a heterosexual male excluding males would be racism too, becuse i'm excluding them based on their sex and not personalities...

Also when someone is solely attracted to a specific race/ethicity thats actually a fetish and is completely normal, different people like different things.

Well, having a preference based on one's race is discriminatory right off the bat. sadly, this kind of honeysuckle happens these days. This is why I'm still single.

Fetish is abnormal!

One shouldn't base one's dating preference on eye color, skin color and hair color. There are other factors that women also should look into rather than one's race or ethnicity.

Different ethnicities have different body types and thus different looks, having a preference for one or another doesn't mean your a racist, you are allowed to not find someone sexually attractive yet have no ill wishes for that person otherwise without being discriminatory!

I'm not going into fetishes again, said all I need to say about that....

 

[EveWasFramed]

When you've messaged ladies in the past, whay ethnicities do you prefer?

I had a preference for Asian women, but I have also sent out messages to white/caucasian women and some afr-american women. None responded back to me.

I only had one Cambodian female send me a response, and where we met for coffee, and a week later, dinner. After that, she never responded to my text message. Plus she was a little "thicker" than I've expected, so she wasn't a good pick for me.

I had another female participant on another dating website email me back. We exchanged emails, but never led to any face-to-face date meetings.

But oh well, this is the sad reality of romance of me living in the US.

So YOU have a preference for Asian women who aren't "thick."
Does that make you a racist? You said people shouldn't choose a mate by eye color, etc but you're choosing by race and body type. There's a bit of hypocrisy going on there I think.

 

[ardour]

Being attracted to the physical characteristics associated with a race isn't racism, it's a preference. Interest based on stereotypes is obviously racist, but that is a separate thought process. Nobody criticizes minorities for wanting to date within their own cultures (or having any other preferences for that matter). Accusations of fetishization (of Asian women), or racism for wanting children that look like you seem to be thrown exclusively at white males. I NEVER hear East Asian, Polynesian, Indian or Arab people accused of this.

Well, it's racism based on what the media feeds you through movies, commercial/advertisement, and the mainstream agenda.

I never said that I'm throwing accusation at white males. I'm just saying that being a white male, you have a better chance of being less lonely and having a date, rather than being of East Asian ancestry (male that is).

Where I live young Asian guys seem to have little trouble socializing with women within their own national/ethnic groups. Everywhere you go there are exclusive Korean or Chinese friend groups where women seem quite relaxed and trusting around ‘their men’. But then that’s not online, and over here in NZ.  

Perhaps you should tailor your efforts towards people of similar background? (Just as a form of advice, not saying there’s anything wrong with dating outside your ethnicity.)

 

[Paraiyar]

When you've messaged ladies in the past, whay ethnicities do you prefer?

I had a preference for Asian women, but I have also sent out messages to white/caucasian women and some afr-american women. None responded back to me.

I only had one Cambodian female send me a response, and where we met for coffee, and a week later, dinner. After that, she never responded to my text message. Plus she was a little "thicker" than I've expected, so she wasn't a good pick for me.

I had another female participant on another dating website email me back. We exchanged emails, but never led to any face-to-face date meetings.

But oh well, this is the sad reality of romance of me living in the US.

So YOU have a preference for Asian women who aren't "thick."
Does that make you a racist? You said people shouldn't choose a mate by eye color, etc but you're choosing by race and body type. There's a bit of hypocrisy going on there I think.

I have a feeling he'll blame the media again...