Do you use this forum more when you feel real lonely, down and out?

[Blue Sky]

Do you use this forum more when you feel real lonely, down and out?
Well I tend to and I think that it helps me alot. I can read through old threads about stuff that relates to me, send pms to members, even shout in the shout box lol. Sure beats sitting in a chair, staring at the wall. Yeah I feel pretty low today.

 

[sweetestbaby]

Advice usually comes quickly on here so I would then instead come here to vent.

 

[Whoaisme]

Quickly maybe to you... for me I sit here type something and then hit refresh a million times (or wait for the auto refresh.)

 

[NewBirth]

Quickly maybe to you... for me I sit here type something and then hit refresh a million times (or wait for the auto refresh.)

i dont have any auto refresh

 

[Whoaisme]

There are a couple plugins for Firefox that let you have that and you many set any interval you wish.

 

[NewBirth]

There are a couple plugins for Firefox that let you have that and you many set any interval you wish.

wayyyy over my head hahaha but that sounds pretty cool

 

[sweetestbaby]

Quickly maybe to you... for me I sit here type something and then hit refresh a million times (or wait for the auto refresh.)

I'm very sorry. Is there something I can help you with?

 

[Whoaisme]

Sweetestbaby... Sure, you can help me figure out why I'm crazy and in need of human companionship at all costs.

 

[sweetestbaby]

Sweetestbaby... Sure, you can help me figure out why I'm crazy and in need of human companionship at all costs.

Yes but I would appreciate it if you could go into more detail (and I wouldn't go as far as calling you crazy because I'm sure what you go through could be understandable).

 

[Whoaisme]

I don't want to take over this thread so I will make other posts sometime..

 

[sweetestbaby]

I don't want to take over this thread so I will make other posts sometime..

There would be nothing wrong with posting it here. If taking over this thread is an issue, you could always pm it to me.

 

[Whoaisme]

Ok, here's the deal in a nutshell. I want to be loved by everyone. In wanting this I cannot really be myself or express myself in any way. Under a false exterior I don't think there exists a real person. I try to do things that others like to do but I find no joy in doing those things.

I personally enjoy simpler things like shopping, walking in a park, taking pictures of things, listening to music, hanging out with people I know, etc.

I want to have sex with every non overweight girl I see which forces me to ignore the overweight girl I'm with (and I think I'm in love with). I treat her like crap because I want everyone else and she doesn't deserve to be treated like that.

 

[sweetestbaby]

Ok, here's the deal in a nutshell. I want to be loved by everyone. In wanting this I cannot really be myself or express myself in any way. Under a false exterior I don't think there exists a real person. I try to do things that others like to do but I find no joy in doing those things.

I personally enjoy simpler things like shopping, walking in a park, taking pictures of things, listening to music, hanging out with people I know, etc.

I want to have sex with every non overweight girl I see which forces me to ignore the overweight girl I'm with (and I think I'm in love with). I treat her like crap because I want everyone else and she doesn't deserve to be treated like that.

Sadly, we can't be loved by everyone, so starting right there I can sense the need for overachievement. Not everything you should be about impressing someone else because it will make you miserable, others will sense that and will feel miserable too after the frustration of failing to figure out the true you, you'll start to doubt yourself, and then you'll never know if anyone truly liked you because you'll then reach a point of never being yourself. You're already aware of your interests, so you're not a lost cause. If all you want with people is sex then that could very well be all you get and then in the process miss out on friendships and relationships and then who knows if those girls would be setting a good example for you or not. If you're going to overemphasize physical looks then you might want to think about and re-evaluate your perception of love.

 

[Whoaisme]

I feel that before I can truly love someone I must have fulfilled my physical desires either with that person or someone else. If every girl is the same sex wise then it won't matter what the final girl looks like as long as I love her.

If I feel that I love my exgf should I just try to meet my desires by finding some random girl for a one night stand (or fool her in to thinking I'm interested until I get what I want [which I consider bad]) or an escort or something like that, or should I try to deal with not having physical desires met and being with the girl I think I love?

 

[sweetestbaby]

I feel that before I can truly love someone I must have fulfilled my physical desires either with that person or someone else. If every girl is the same sex wise then it won't matter what the final girl looks like as long as I love her.

If I feel that I love my exgf should I just try to meet my desires by finding some random girl for a one night stand (or fool her in to thinking I'm interested until I get what I want [which I consider bad]) or an escort or something like that, or should I try to deal with not having physical desires met and being with the girl I think I love?

There is no good reason for fooling a girl, so I really think you should set your ex free. You don't necessarily have to go for an escort but you should go for someone who would be on the same page as you and knows what you look for in a girl physically and your importance in physical attraction. There is nothing wrong with wanting just sex but the other person has to be the same way, you can't just take advantage of someone. When it comes to loving, it has to be mutual or not at all. Lastly, always be honest with the one you're with, even if you're scared of being a jerk.

 

[Whoaisme]

I really want both sex and love but if I can't get both in the same place this is where I have a problem.

 

[sweetestbaby]

I really want both sex and love but if I can't get both in the same place this is where I have a problem.

I personally believe that you could benefit greatly from counseling because you need to be made aware of who the true you is, why you treat people the way you do, what you fear, and whether you're wanting sex for sex or to satisfy something (ex. loneliness).

 

[Whoaisme]

I do need counseling and medication. I have clinical depression and have been hospitalized for it in the past.

One of the problems I have is that I cannot open up to a counselor. Many of the constant thoughts that cross my mind are very illegal and many people find them morally wrong. This leads me to worry that a counselor would report me to the police.

Medication both helped and hurt somewhat in the past.

 

[sweetestbaby]

I do need counseling and medication. I have clinical depression and have been hospitalized for it in the past.

One of the problems I have is that I cannot open up to a counselor. Many of the constant thoughts that cross my mind are very illegal and many people find them morally wrong. This leads me to worry that a counselor would report me to the police.

Medication both helped and hurt somewhat in the past.

They're bound to confidentiality until you've committed a crime. How did the medication hurt you?

 

[Whoaisme]

I've been on two or three SSRI's... The medications had sexual side effects (couldn't climax while on them) and while being in a good mood most of the time, some of the time I became even more suicidal than I had been in the first place.