Men are still expected to pay for the first date

[Revengineer]

http://money.cnn.com/2015/09/07/news/economy/who-pays-for-first-date

I guess some things never change...

 

[VanillaCreme]

Never been on a date, but I wouldn't expect the guy to pay. It would be nice if he did though.

 

[Revengineer]

Never been on a date, but I wouldn't expect the guy to pay. It would be nice if he did though.

You must be part of that fabled 10% of people who prefer 50/50. If only there were more of you.

 

[VanillaCreme]

Never been on a date, but I wouldn't expect the guy to pay. It would be nice if he did though.

You must be part of that fabled 10% of people who prefer 50/50. If only there were more of you.

50/50, or if he couldn't pay for whatever reason, and I could pay for all of it, I would. I don't split hairs. If you're going out to eat or whatever, then just do it and enjoy yourself.

 

[Triple Bogey]

Never been on a date, but I wouldn't expect the guy to pay. It would be nice if he did though.

Never been on a date ?
How come ?

 

[VanillaCreme]

Never been on a date, but I wouldn't expect the guy to pay. It would be nice if he did though.

Never been on a date ?
How come ?

Just haven't been. To be honest, that's not really my scene. I'd rather cook at home and watch something or play games.

 

[Triple Bogey]

Never been on a date, but I wouldn't expect the guy to pay. It would be nice if he did though.

Never been on a date ?
How come ?

Just haven't been. To be honest, that's not really my scene. I'd rather cook at home and watch something or play games.

okay

 

[TheRealCallie]

Never been on a date, but I wouldn't expect the guy to pay. It would be nice if he did though.

50/50, or if he couldn't pay for whatever reason, and I could pay for all of it, I would. I don't split hairs. If you're going out to eat or whatever, then just do it and enjoy yourself.

Same for me. Who the hell cares who pays. Also, I've never been on an actual date before either. I've been out and I've been married, but no actual date.

 

[EveWasFramed]

My two cents:
If I invite you out, I'm going to pay. I've done so plenty of times.
If someome invites me out, I expect them to pay.
This applies to dates - not friends, per se, tho I usually pay ANYTIME I invite someone out.

 

[VanillaCreme]

My two cents:
If I invite you out, I'm going to pay. I've some so plenty of times.
If someome invites me out, I expect them to pay.
This applies to dates - not friends, per se, tho I usually pay ANYTIME I invite someone out.

Now that I think of it, I could say my only date was with you, Eve. I think I'd rather be happy over that than think it's sad my guy hasn't ever taken me out.

:club:

 

[Despicable Me]

I've been out and I've been married, but no actual date.

You've been out? With the guy you married? Yeah, that's called a date...
Unless every single time you were 'out' with him only to do nothing but errands than you can't really say you've been out with a partner/interest before but not 'on a date'. A date really doesn't imply very much.
That's like saying you rode a horse before but you've never been horse riding. It's simply incorrect. I don't see anything in the dictionary implying that a 'date' has to be anything more than 'going out' with a romantic partner/interest.

Not to generalize, but I've seen plenty of women make this same mistake before.
What is the deal with that exactly? I am rather curious for personal reasons. I don't really get it. I don't get it at all. What is a 'date' then?

And on the nature of this topic, I don't see why you expected this to change, revengineer. Society is still generally quite primitive on these sort of social issues overall. It's easier to list off stuff that HAS changed than stuff that hasn't.

 

[AmytheTemperamental]

I personally think that the person who sends the invite, should be the one paying. However, I would only go out if I was able to cover the costs myself. And if the person asks to split the bill, I am paying.

 

[BeyondShy]

I have not been on many of them but I have paid for all of my dates. I don't think about it, I just do it. And in the future I will do the same thing./

 

[TheRealCallie]

I've been out and I've been married, but no actual date.

You've been out? With the guy you married? Yeah, that's called a date...
Unless every single time you were 'out' with him only to do nothing but errands than you can't really say you've been out with a partner/interest before but not 'on a date'. A date really doesn't imply very much.
That's like saying you rode a horse before but you've never been horse riding. It's simply incorrect. I don't see anything in the dictionary implying that a 'date' has to be anything more than 'going out' with a romantic partner/interest.

Not to generalize, but I've seen plenty of women make this same mistake before.
What is the deal with that exactly? I am rather curious for personal reasons. I don't really get it. I don't get it at all. What is a 'date' then?

And on the nature of this topic, I don't see why you expected this to change, revengineer. Society is still generally quite primitive on these sort of social issues overall. It's easier to list off stuff that HAS changed than stuff that hasn't.

Um, no, I've never been on an actual DATE before. Yes, it was with the guy I married, but it wasn't a ******* date. I know what a **** date it, it was NOT a date, when it always involved other people.

Also, just because you got on a horse, doesn't mean you rode him....

 

[EveWasFramed]

My two cents:
If I invite you out, I'm going to pay. I've some so plenty of times.
If someome invites me out, I expect them to pay.
This applies to dates - not friends, per se, tho I usually pay ANYTIME I invite someone out.

Now that I think of it, I could say my only date was with you, Eve. I think I'd rather be happy over that than think it's sad my guy hasn't ever taken me out.

:club:

Id totally take you out again if you were close enough.

 

[SofiasMami]

My two cents:
If I invite you out, I'm going to pay. I've done so plenty of times.
If someome invites me out, I expect them to pay.
This applies to dates - not friends, per se, tho I usually pay ANYTIME I invite someone out.

I agree, although if I go out with a female friend (which happens way more often than those date thingies ), we usually stipulate to going Dutch (each paying our own way).
I think the fact that men often pay for the first date is a function of men more often doing the inviting for a first date. I don't think I've ever asked a guy for a first date but if I did, I would pay or at least pay my own way - and/ or or suggest an low-key activity that is free or almost free.

-Teresa

 

[BeyondShy]

Id totally take you out again if you were close enough.

How'd you get so lucky? (Whoops, did I say that outloud?)

Even I, Joe Loser (just reading my driver's license here) would gladly take TheRealCallie out for a RealDinner at a RealRestaurant that I will ReallyPayFor but she does not like warm weather because she's ReallyStubborn.

I think that covers it.

 

[ardour]

My two cents:
If I invite you out, I'm going to pay. I've done so plenty of times.
If someome invites me out, I expect them to pay.
This applies to dates - not friends, per se, tho I usually pay ANYTIME I invite someone out.

This is all well and good… except there’s still a societal expectation for men to ask women out, and continue to do the asking out. So by default men will be paying for dates.

 

[BeyondShy]

This is all well and good… except there’s still a societal expectation for men to ask women out, and continue to do the asking out. So by default men will be paying for dates.

So what?

I would gladly pay for an evening out with a very nice lady and enjoy her company with good food and conversation. Or, I can save my money and stay at home and make posts on the computer.

 

[EveWasFramed]

My two cents:
If I invite you out, I'm going to pay. I've done so plenty of times.
If someome invites me out, I expect them to pay.
This applies to dates - not friends, per se, tho I usually pay ANYTIME I invite someone out.

This is all well and good… except there’s still a societal expectation for men to ask women out, and continue to do the asking out. So by default men will be paying for dates.

It should be noted that some men WANT to pay. Some guys are old fashioned. More than you might think. That's my experience, but that's likely due to my age (and the ages of the men I date). Even if the man pays, I would always offer to leave the tip. Or, if more dates followed, Id always offer to pay.
I won't argue the point about societal norms. I also wasn't speaking on anyone's behalf but my own.
I still think the one doing the inviting should pay. Yes, I've invited people out and I paid. Most guys I've been out with find it a bit refreshing, but I can also tell that it usually doesn't sit well with them. I think a lot of men expect men to pay too, if I'm being honest.