Questions for the Men

[randomguy]

Ahh my old home, how I loveee this thread… right so wouldnt be me if I didnt annoy the lads with a question !

How would you feel about having a wife who would never ever cook for you after your 13 hour long shift? Her choice who cares? Or Hey, thats a long shift, I deserve to come home to a meal?

If I'm working 13 hour shifts Princess getting my old lady to cook me tea is the least of my worries.

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

Ahh my old home, how I loveee this thread… right so wouldnt be me if I didnt annoy the lads with a question !

How would you feel about having a wife who would never ever cook for you after your 13 hour long shift? Her choice who cares? Or Hey, thats a long shift, I deserve to come home to a meal?

I don't care if she cooks, I just care if there's food.
I suck at cooking too, so I can't judge.
So long as we can afford it, I'm cool with Taco Bell.
Or, ramen.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

If I'm working 13 hour shifts Princess getting my old lady to cook me tea is the least of my worries.

Okay a video on YouTube showed a husband and wife arguing about this, he came home hungry from work and angry that she didn't cook. However, all the dishes and laundry was done...

Now cooking is my love language, so I would deffo have a meal ready for my man, but it was kinda sad that he said to her... "why are we even married" like over food, that would break my heart.

I don't care if she cooks, I just care if there's food.
I suck at cooking too, so I can't judge.
So long as we can afford it, I'm cool with Taco Bell.
Or, ramen.

Would you feel a little disheartened if she didn't order or cook but she did all the laundry and dishes?

 

[randomguy]

Okay a video on YouTube showed a husband and wife arguing about this, he came home hungry from work and angry that she didn't cook. However, all the dishes and laundry was done...

Now cooking is my love language, so I would deffo have a meal ready for my man, but it was kinda sad that he said to her... "why are we even married" like over food, that would break my heart.


Would you feel a little disheartened if she didn't order or cook but she did all the laundry and dishes?

I'm not a child, I wouldn't marry or expect someone to cook, clean and wash for me tbh. Sounds like this guy wants a mother not a wife.

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

Would you feel a little disheartened if she didn't order or cook but she did all the laundry and dishes?

No, not really. TBH, I don't like being coddled. Cuddled, yes, but not coddled. lol. I'm so used to running my own system that I'd be grateful if she wanted to help and just picked up whatever out of the bucket list of the bulk, but I'm not going to hold it against her if she doesn't, either. That is, provided of course, that she also takes care of herself without a man. I guess I prefer the idea of Mutual Independence, rather than what people usually think of as Codependence?

 

[user 139760]

I did the same too, once. In my case, was a bit different; she wasn't working and I ALWAYS cooked. Would've been nice to have the favor returned at least once in that relationship. I suck with ideas but enjoy cooking, but when I was doing 50+ hour weekdays, would've been nice to have it at least once.
Relationships are supposed to be 50/50. I'm still looking for someone who can pull their own weight.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

I'm not a child, I wouldn't marry or expect someone to cook, clean and wash for me tbh. Sounds like this guy wants a mother not a wife.

You're so good! She said she's not his mother in the video... Okay RandomGuy, you and her are deffo on the same wave length lol

 

[CenotaphGirl]

I did the same too, once. In my case, was a bit different; she wasn't working and I ALWAYS cooked. Would've been nice to have the favor returned at least once in that relationship. I suck with ideas but enjoy cooking, but when I was doing 50+ hour weekdays, would've been nice to have it at least once.
Relationships are supposed to be 50/50. I'm still looking for someone who can pull their own weight.

Like I'll be real I have never been 50/50 and I'm not sure I'd have what it takes to see myself as "equal" to a man. With my ex, I'd always cook and I'd only eat once he gets home and only after he started eating. Thats how I grew up, my dad always sat at the head of the dinner table and started his meal first, (unless we was granted permission to start early for some special reason). My mum always had to serve, even if he cooked, and so many other rules. Sometimes I wonder if growing up like this has made me too weird for todays dating scene lol I cant imagine my partner coming home to an empty table after a long day at work, that would be... unthinkable to me personally, however a lot of men don't even want their partner to do things for them too, so theres this whole new balance to contend with.

 

[user 139760]

Like I'll be real I have never been 50/50 and I'm not sure I'd have what it takes to see myself as "equal" to a man. With my ex, I'd always cook and I'd only eat once he gets home and only after he started eating. Thats how I grew up, my dad always sat at the head of the dinner table and started his meal first, (unless we was granted permission to start early for some special reason). My mum always had to serve, even if he cooked, and so many other rules. Sometimes I wonder if growing up like this has made me too weird for todays dating scene lol I cant imagine my partner coming home to an empty table after a long day at work, that would be... unthinkable to me personally, however a lot of men don't even want their partner to do things for them too, so theres this whole new balance to contend with.

Sounds like you were raised submissive. I'm sure lots of men enjoy that, lots of people get their rocks off wielding power and abusing it.
I personnally find submissiveness to be an unattractive quality. But that's just me.

 

[TheSkaFish]

Like I'll be real I have never been 50/50 and I'm not sure I'd have what it takes to see myself as "equal" to a man. With my ex, I'd always cook and I'd only eat once he gets home and only after he started eating. Thats how I grew up, my dad always sat at the head of the dinner table and started his meal first, (unless we was granted permission to start early for some special reason). My mum always had to serve, even if he cooked, and so many other rules. Sometimes I wonder if growing up like this has made me too weird for todays dating scene lol I cant imagine my partner coming home to an empty table after a long day at work, that would be... unthinkable to me personally, however a lot of men don't even want their partner to do things for them too, so theres this whole new balance to contend with.

Honestly it sounds a little anachronistic. Kind of like...Victorian, you know? I don't mean any offense, it's just how it seems to me.

Whether it's weird or not, I guess depends on the people you meet. For a lot of people, it probably isn't the norm. But if you meet other people who were raised in a similar way, they won't find it weird.

I think you should do what feels right for you. If you want to maintain tradition, that's fine. But if you decide that it isn't really for you, then that's OK too and you shouldn't feel like you HAVE to do it.

As for me, I'd definitely appreciate the meal. It would be a nice pick-me-up after a long day. But it's not required. Maybe after 13 hours I might just get something for myself on the way back.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Sounds like you were raised submissive. I'm sure lots of men enjoy that, lots of people get their rocks off wielding power and abusing it.
I personnally find submissiveness to be an unattractive quality. But that's just me.

Yeps there are sooo many men who feel that way, there is deffo a new balance to deal with. Even my ex hated when my mum would be on my case because I wasn't like fussing around him lool he couldn't stand it when I had to fuss to keep her off my case, that didn't come naturally me or work for us at all.

Honestly it sounds a little anachronistic. Kind of like...Victorian, you know? I don't mean any offense, it's just how it seems to me.

Whether it's weird or not, I guess depends on the people you meet. For a lot of people, it probably isn't the norm. But if you meet other people who were raised in a similar way, they won't find it weird.

I think you should do what feels right for you. If you want to maintain tradition, that's fine. But if you decide that it isn't really for you, then that's OK too and you shouldn't feel like you HAVE to do it.

As for me, I'd definitely appreciate the meal. It would be a nice pick-me-up after a long day. But it's not required. Maybe after 13 hours I might just get something for myself on the way back.

yeah I get what you mean Skafishyyy. I think the thing is, being raised this way it's just the "right way" for me... anyything else would feel very wrong. I could only treat my husband that way if he's 96 and I married for money lol but thats a diff topic

 

[user 139760]

Yeps there are sooo many men who feel that way, there is deffo a new balance to deal with. Even my ex hated when my mum would be on my case because I wasn't like fussing around him lool he couldn't stand it when I had to fuss to keep her off my case, that didn't come naturally me or work for us at all.


yeah I get what you mean Skafishyyy. I think the thing is, being raised this way it's just the "right way" for me... anyything else would feel very wrong. I could only treat my husband that way if he's 96 and I married for money lol but thats a diff topic

You sure you're Brit? Sounds anachronistic from all the Brits I've ever known.
"Sorry!"

 

[CenotaphGirl]

You sure you're Brit? Sounds anachronistic from all the Brits I've ever known.
"Sorry!"

Oh im a total brit brat but my parents were strange lol only long term married couple out of all of my friends parents though, so it worked for them lol

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

You sure you're Brit? Sounds anachronistic from all the Brits I've ever known.
"Sorry!"

That would be us here in America.

 

[randomguy]

You sure you're Brit? Sounds anachronistic from all the Brits I've ever known.
"Sorry!"

English girls, in my experience, are very submissive. Now the Scots and Irish that's a different story.

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

English girls, in my experience, are very submissive. Now the Scots and Irish that's a different story.

What kind of submissive are we talking about?
Like actually submissive, or like topping from the bottom kind of submissive?
Cause I don't have the patience for the later.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

What kind of submissive are we talking about?
Like actually submissive, or like topping from the bottom kind of submissive?
Cause I don't have the patience for the later.

I feel so innocent, I dont even know what this means

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

I feel so innocent, I dont even know what this means

Don't worry about it Cen!

 

[user 139760]

English girls, in my experience, are very submissive. Now the Scots and Irish that's a different story.

Ahhh, now those are women Met an irish girl once. Nothing happened much, but the whole fiery redhead irish girl really applied to her lol.

 

[randomguy]

topping from the bottom

Hahah I haven't heard that phrase in years, a lifetime ago I was in the house band at the Torture Garden London's top BDSM club I spent most nights there scared out of my wits.

Google ' English Tradwife ' it's a growing phenomenon in the UK has been for the last 20 years or so.