Attracting non-committals

[ClosetGeek]

I think I have adressed this topic elsewhere at least once.
I just wanted to shortly tell a story that happened to me yesterday. Similar stuff happen to me pretty often.
Yesterday I went downtown to get some stuff. I was walking home and on a busy street, I saw this guy I used to work with.
I was however never good buddies with this guy like I am with my other old co-workers.
He was married once, divorced, and acted like a total player towards women. I found him to be nauseating. The only conversation we exchanged was "hi" and "bye".
So when I saw him on the same street as I was walking on, I pretended to look at some shop windows and elsewhere. He is on my list of people whom I do not want to converse with.
Guess what happened?
He changed his route and came all the way to where I was and said with a smile "Hey you!". He went to tell about himself and his life and asked me if I wanted to have coffee with him. He is a very good looking guy but I find his attitude to be very disguisting.
I told him I can't at that moment and that I'll call him next week, which I probably won't.
A lot people insist that men or women do things to attract non-committal women or men. I think this is wrong. I think non-committal men and women, talk to many men or women, cause they are constantly looking for new people to manipulate.

 

[EveWasFramed]

I have to say that I agree with you there, CG.

 

[Unacceptance]

Not manipulate, copulate.

 

[EveWasFramed]

Not manipulate, copulate.

lol, you're bad.

 

[Porman]

Why do you think everyone is trying to manipulate everyone?

 

[ClosetGeek]

Why do you think everyone is trying to manipulate everyone?

My post is not about everyone on this planet. I am referring to individuals who are non-committals and those people they manipulate or capulate like unacceptance said. lol.

 

[Porman]

what is a "non-committal"?

 

[Lonesome Crow]

I think we run across variouse types of people in our lives. No more nor no less of whatever.
It's what we focus on and where we are at in our lives.

I dunno..maybe in 10-20 years, If a young man approched you or gave you a compliment
wheather his single or not. You probably think you still have it, flatter or it was a good thing, wheather your single or not.lmao

 

[ClosetGeek]

what is a "non-committal"?

Men who can't zip up their pants, they walk around with pants around their ankles.

 

[ClosetGeek]

I think we run across variouse types of people in our lives. No more nor no less of whatever.
It's what we focus on and where we are at in our lives.

I dunno..maybe in 10-20 years, If a young man approched you or gave you a compliment
wheather his single or not. You probably think you still have it, flatter or it was a good thing, wheather your single or not.lmao

First paragraph I totally agree. The second paragraph, can't agree cause I whether I feel confident or pretty about myself depends on me.

 

[Porman]

Why do you think everyone is trying to manipulate everyone?

My post is not about everyone on this planet. I am referring to individuals who are non-committals and those people they manipulate or capulate like unacceptance said. lol.

lol ok, makes sense now

 

[Lonesome Crow]

That guy was just looking for someone, anyone. He wasn't trying to maniplate you.
He's just single again and probably better off being single for a while and just date.

You didn't attacted him more than anyone else.

Dating is not marriage or a relationship.
Dating dosn't even mean sex or envolve sex.
It can lead to sex..but generally it takes 2 to tango and with permission.
That's why you date or hang out...so you can get to know a person better.

You can't have a guy make a commitment and give you 1/2 of what he owns
just becuase he asked you out on a date.lol
What if he finds out he dosen't like you ?

You can't have guy give you verything just because you're dating ...
That's why you live with someone first...what if you find out you don't like that person after you live with them ?
You break up...it's healty. That's what you're suppost to do..
So a marriage is not an institution.

That's why you date..you party and do whatever when you're young..To get it out of your system.
When it's time to settle down...you won't feel like I missed out on life or your youth.
So when you're wife puts you in the dog house or sometimes you get into an argument...you're going
to cheat on her. When you have kids or babies..you're not going to freaken bars.

 

[ClosetGeek]

That guy was just looking for someone, anyone. He wasn't trying to maniplate you.
He's just single again and probably better off being single for a while and just date.

That guy I met has the following history. He divorced his wife cause he cheated on her. He is 45 and tells everyone that women over 25 don't do it for him, cause women over 25 find him to be impossible. He is not looking to date, he is looking to copulate. He also regularly flies to Thailand to sleep with prostitutes. He sounds like a great catch doesn't he.

You didn't attacted him more than anyone else.
Dating is not marriage or a relationship.
Dating dosn't even mean sex or envolve sex.
It can lead to sex..but generally it takes 2 to tango and with permission.
That's why you date or hang out...so you can get to know a person better.

Of course. I am not freaking 18 years old, I am 34. If a guys tells you he does not want a normal relationship from day one, he is actually telling, hey let's f. You don't understand, this guy is not saying let's date. He is saying "he can't date" and "he cannot get married", what other options are left out? He also does not like be friends, he only wants to f.

You can't have a guy make a commitment and give you 1/2 of what he owns
just becuase he asked you out on a date.lol
What if he finds out he dosen't like you ?

What if I find him appauling cause he is playing games and telling me he is not into normal relationships? [/quote]

You can't have guy give you verything just because you're dating ...
That's why you live with someone first...what if you find out you don't like that person after you live with them ?
You break up...it's healty. That's what you're suppost to do..
So a marriage is not an institution.

Utter bollocks and total BS. If the guy does not want a relationship why waste time living with him?

That's why you date..you party and do whatever when you're young..To get it out of your system.
When it's time to settle down...you won't feel like I missed out on life or your youth.
So when you're wife puts you in the dog house or sometimes you get into an argument...you're going
to cheat on her. When you have kids or babies..you're not going to freaken bars.

I am 34, been there done that. You are going to cheat on your wife? WOW, you are freaking impressive.

 

[Porman]

That guy I met has the following history. He divorced his wife cause he cheated on her. He is 45 and tells everyone that women over 25 don't do it for him, cause women over 25 find him to be impossible. He is not looking to date, he is looking to copulate. He also regularly flies to Thailand to sleep with prostitutes. He sounds like a great catch doesn't he.

I think you should have included this earlier lol

 

[Naleena]

You can't have guy give you verything just because you're dating ...
That's why you live with someone first...what if you find out you don't like that person after you live with them ?

Speaking of living with someone, I think today is the day some of my "stuff" is coming up. I got to thinking about thiswhile reading the thread. Last bf of four years asked me many times to move in but, there was no way I was going to do that. I was afraid of what would happen. Men are not the only ones who have commitment phobia. While someday I would like to have someone in my life, there is nothing that scares the hell out of me more than a guy who wants to move things along quickly. There was a time in my life I would have been a little more relaxed about such things but, no more. I would have to know someone at least two good years before I would even consider moving in with them and then he would have to be awfully special for me to do that. You never know someone until you have been around them for a very long time. Both people start to see the darker side of each other and it's a lot easier to work out conflicts (for lack of a better word) when you don't live with them than it is if you have to be in the same house as they are. It's good to get away from them. Then again, the men I have had, slowly (slowly being the key here) tried to take away my freedom by trying to dominate me. They never do it all at once when the relationship is new. My biggest fear is not being alone, it's being tied down in a relationship with some man that isn't right for me. I don't think I will ever get married because of that.