Hmmm this thread intrigues me, this is a topic I have been thinking a lot about lately. As a young woman myself, I have struggled in navigating the modern western world's vast and variable ideas on sexuality, usually unsuccessfully. In general, I do not judge pornography too harshly, I am pretty open-minded about peoples sexual needs and I have seen my fair share of it (yes, girls can watch porn too, haha). Mostly I explored it due to curiosity, there were moments when I found it arousing, but most of it was unappealing, and a lot of it was disturbing, mostly for its awful treatment of women and the ridiculous expectations and misconceptions it creates about female sexuality. As much damage as this industry does (coupled with Hollywood media, pharmaceuticals, and countless unconscious and subversive societal messages) to women, I also believe it to be a double edged sword. The brain is a strange and powerful thing, and just as any other neurological stimulation can be programmed and distorted, so can what we find arousing. For young men, and give me some slack here because I am speculating, but it seems like I hear this idea being reflected in a lot of the above posts, being bombarded with pornographic images as their first real introduction to sex and to females can create a lot of confusion and social problems. A friend once told me that he had a hard time appreciating even very beautiful natural women because he had been hardwired to be aroused by the female bodies of the porn industry. To women, it says that this is what men want and find desirable, and they are incapable of understanding anything else. It seems trite, but as a college student I have witnessed girls play out these exact ideas by simply getting ready for a night out; clothes are selected to bring all focus to their breasts, ass, and crotch and they are usually so inebriated before they even leave the apartment that even if they were to meet a man who was interested in a deeper connection, she would probably be unable to form a sentence. Yes, females want and enjoy sex as much as men do, and it is empowering to feel sexually attractive, but ladies, we are playing a large part in our own objectification. Yeah, we look good, but we have so much more to offer, why not advertise that as well? The problem lies in what I have dubbed the "mental-wall-of-otherness;" both men and woman have stopped relating to each other as human beings and adopted this idea that we are defined by our genitals. Where is the empathy, people? I hate it when I hear things like "I am giving up on women" or "Men only want one thing" blah blah blah. Everyone of us is a human being capable of amazing things, we all have gifts, skills, needs, desires, etc and it is time that we took that back. I think both men and women are to blame for the degradation of sex, which is very sad, because it is a beautiful and powerful thing. Like anything else of value, relationships and sex take time and compassion, and I guess my message to all of you is, please don't give up. I know, it seems an odd request, but intimate connection is what it’s all about!!
So, long story short, Snow, I guess I am impressed by your decision to burn your porn. Thanks for sharing your experience!
