Women - What completely turns you off?

[jean-vic]

True but there's a difference between always ending up with bad men and actually going for that type. Of course some women do and some women do to the extreme. There's even a fetish that I can't remember the name of. I just think personally a lot of women would like a nice guy. Its just hard to tell which they are when so many can fake "nice guy" so well...

I'm not disputing that most women want a nice guy. The point I'm making is is that in the younger years (late teens - early to mid 20s) women, girls, whatever, tend to ignore the evidence of kindness in certain lads in favour of more attractive males. It seems that only in later years that women tend to focus on outward appearance and start to notice the innate attractiveness of men based on personality over looks. I mean, if a lad with a track record of being a gentleman, but he is ugly and/or overweight, asks a young girl out, in most cases she will say no, yet a decent lad who is good looking will be snapped up and if he then later turns into World's Number A-Hole, the woman bemoans her luck but would still rather go for a decent looking bloke over the unattractive gentleman who never treated her in any way but well. The other day at work a girl was complaining to me about how her last boyfriend treated her badly. I told her that she needs to move on and find someone new because he was enjoying her continued single life as he lauded his new girlfriend over her. Her response? "Yeah, I will try to get a new boyfriend. He's got to be fit, though. That's a deffo, right off." Already, half the male population is excluded from her search, even though within that group there are lads who could and would happily be the nice guy she wants. So, I say, in younger years, nice is outweighed by looks while later women have matured to recognise that personality greatly outweigh looks.

Men are the same. Shallow. It's not a symptom of women only. Men go out looking for a "fit bird" with whom to have a bit of fun with, exploiting the girls' natural attraction to them. It's a vicious circle.

 

[annik]

I'm not sure if I've just ended up in the mature (er) end without wanting to admit it while still thinking I'm young and maybe thats why I feel the way I do. I mean I agree both sexes do it. But with exceptions. Even at 18 I never said "as long as he's fit" lol

 

[IgnoredOne]

I don't think that women, even young women, are as drawn to looks as some posters suggest. They're definitely drawn to /something/, some not completely definable combination of personality and appearance, but its more than a bit prosaic to think its just a certain aspect of appearance.

I would say that having a track record of being a gentlemen, actually, tends to work against the individual quite often, or seems to. Too often, after all, it can mean that a person is actually a walkover and that's just boring.

Ultimately, you hear this over and over again, but its true; confidence is one of the most important traits. I've actually known girls who went out with(and fell hard for) guys they said they found genuinely unattractive at first; I don't believe that I've ever heard the opposite from men going for women they didn't find attractive.

 

[Equinox]

I think I'll add "crazy zealots" to my list.

 

[goldenrod]

I didn't fabricate any quote. Why would I even do something that could be proven wrong so obviously and publicly? What may have happened is that I cut and pasted ineptly, which I will be more careful about in future.

I think that in general women are more forgiving of physical appearances than men. How often do you see a man showing off an ugly or overweight woman proudly to his friends? How often do you see the opposite? I rest my case.

 

[TheSolitaryMan]

Ultimately, you hear this over and over again, but its true; confidence is one of the most important traits. I've actually known girls who went out with(and fell hard for) guys they said they found genuinely unattractive at first; I don't believe that I've ever heard the opposite from men going for women they didn't find attractive.

Actually, this is quite an interesting point.

This girl that messed my feelings around in the past, she wasn't a girl that I would have immediately found particularly attractive physically. She wasn't "conventionally beautiful", and my friends commented rather harshly that they were surprised I found her as physically attractive as I did (I was quite smitten with her at the time).

However, I fell for her pretty hard because she was so confident when dealing with me. I still remember when she first suddenly cuddled up to me in a lecture: my immediate mental reaction was "Holy honeysuckle, is this for real?! She likes me?"

Once I got to know her I found her really, really pretty. Both physically and for her personality. I remember staring at her face and wishing I could kiss it or touch it.

Then, sadly, I found out she was very confused emotionally and mixed up with her life goals, so we remained (and remain) friends only. The attraction fizzled away and I realised her confidence was really born out of not knowing what she wanted from me.

However, it opened my eyes to how hugely enthralling confidence is and ever since I've tried to improve it as much as I can.

 

[LoneKiller]

I'm a male and I must admit this thread amuses me. For some reason, some men feel that if they send a woman a picture of their penis online it will turn the woman on. There is absolutely nothing attractive about a man's bag. I'm sorry boys.

---

I have a serious question for the women of this forum. It has been said that a lot of ladies like the "Bad Boy" image, but I'm wondering something.

Why is it that so many poor women that are physically abused by their boyfriend or spouse continue to stay with him?

 

[Lollipop286]

I think I can try to answer this to a certain degree.

Why? Sometimes they don't even know. After a while it seems normal to them maybe. Maybe they're scared to leave them, that nobody else will want them since these men sometimes put into the girl's head that she's just some worthless piece of crap. Maybe they're threatened that if they leave, something will happen. You really don't know for sure, there isn't just one set reason for this.

 

[JamaisVu]

Some women probably just feel trapped. Not everyone has a lot of cash/family, nowhere to run and hide. A restraining order doesn't do a **** thing to stop someone who's more than willing to beat the honeysuckle out of you. For others it may be love/forgiveness gone overboard, paired with hope that they'll change after sincere apologies, etc. Others may have been abused before, and just sort of stoically accept it.

 

[LoneKiller]

Some women probably just feel trapped. Not everyone has a lot of cash/family, nowhere to run and hide. A restraining order doesn't do a **** thing to stop someone who's more than willing to beat the honeysuckle out of you. For others it may be love/forgiveness gone overboard, paired with hope that they'll change after sincere apologies, etc. Others may have been abused before, and just sort of stoically accept it.

That is absolutely appalling. When my aunt first met her husband he struck her. She went into the kitchen, come back out with a six pack of canned beer and threw it at him causing him to need several stitches over his eye. Never raised his hand to her ever again.

God Bless.

 

[JamaisVu]

Your Aunt's a courageous woman. If you've ever seen the look of pure deranged rage in someone's eyes, it can be terrifying -- not everyone's willing to cross someone like that.

 

[LoneKiller]

Your Aunt's a courageous woman. If you've ever seen the look of pure deranged rage in someone's eyes, it can be terrifying -- not everyone's willing to cross someone like that.

She's a tough lady.

 

[WishingWell]

Things that will keep me from dating a man are: Smoking, heavy drinking or illegal drug use, obesity (I don't mean a bit heavy), and not looking clean.

Things that will make me stop dating a man are: Not believing in God (my choice, right?), foul language, dishonesty, cheating--if we agreed to date only each other--and bad manners.

 

[Arsenic Queen]

a lot of turn offs, including:
Smoking; judgemental narrow minds; disrespect; artistic despise (danger zone); bad hygiene; constant impatience; attempts to knock down my dreams or projects; someone who can't accept me for who I am.


deal breakers being:
cheating; artistic despise; disrespect; refusal to offer presence in the hard times; lack of trust; expecting me to be the only financial motor of the relationship; asking me to quit my kids for them.

 

[Okiedokes]

Smelly, narrow minded, judgemental, rude sarcasm, flirty with other women, selfishness, tries to change me, thinks highly of himself over others, puts pressure on me.

 

[Nolife Princess]

A guy that honeysuckle talks me like: like lines of old "you are so beautiful, or you have the sexiest eyes, or you have a great body.. bla bla all honeysuckle talk! don't wanna hear that!

The guy on the wedding singer (Glen Gulia) he is so yuk! he thinks he looks so good, and talks all that crap.. YUUUK! lol

Bad teeth-
Bad hygiene-

Although I am not attracted to a 'large' guy.. I cant think of anyone more sexy than 'curly' of the three stooges! the reason is because he is fun, happy, and would make for an awesome date mate!!
Down to earth and fun loving wins over good looks anytime!!

 

[Arsenic Queen]

Down to earth and fun loving wins over good looks anytime!![/b]

For me too, big time!

Smelly, narrow minded, judgemental, rude sarcasm, flirty with other women, selfishness, tries to change me, thinks highly of himself over others, puts pressure on me.

I agree with that too, very much. Although smelly sometimes is unavoidable.