The thing with the couple in your example is they paired up when they were young and aged together. Thatās a far cry from waiting until middle age to start dating.
Iām not sure how to choose not to be superficial over this, and I have tried: gone to singles meetups where there were mainly older age groups present, divorcees probably. And while some of them seemed nice enough as people, as far as the sexual attraction side of it went, well there was none. And I couldnāt help feeling angry at some of these women, smiling, expecting me to come over and chat them up I guess. They have already had their lives ā men having shown up for them for decades, but Iāve missed mine, and now Iām expected to turn up for them in their 40s and 50s, someone who they wouldnāt even have spoken to me when we were in our twenties. Itās āmy turnā and I should be grateful having finally been given a chance when weāre old and unable to have children.
I don't think it's a simple matter of bypass decades of psychological development and choosing to settle for something I don't want and can't even picture.