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I am at home with family today. I have been embraced by my parents, brothers (both kin and good friends, and nephews). My whole day has been filled with love and peace and fraternity. My day has been filled with companionship. Yet, I want for more. This is the first time in three years she is...

When my wife and I separated in the summer of 2003, my life entered a tailspin of depression and loathing. I loathed I had lost someone so beautiful and so loving, a woman who made had treated me so well and loved me so completely. But I didn’t understand love yet. I was depressed because I had...

Why do we think we can cheat the fates, make magic out of nothing? Why do we foolish people think our dreams, our hopes, matter to anyone but ourselves? When someone has slowly turned away from you, step by step, each month putting more distance between you and her, why should you act like each...

First off, I want to say thank you to all of you who offer advice to me when I am in the mood to post. I know I don't respond very much to your comments but I do appreciate your comments and observations and I really do read and take to heart what you say. This site is a place for me to share my...

I know I should let things go but it is not as easy as I would like. I wish it were as easy as taking out a chip from my hard drive, but I think I am a defective model. I try every day to get over her, to let her become the past, but my mind and my heart, will not let me let her go. I am sure...

I was at a buddy's house last night with some friends, drinking beer and playing the xbox kinect and having a good time. My phone rings (this is midnight mind you) and it is my ex. I obviously answer the phone and talk to her and before you know, we talk until 2 am in the morning about nothing...

So she emails me today, asks how I am doing. I don't immediately respond because whenever I communicate with her I want the words to be perfect, to completely convey what I want her to know. So apparently, my writer's block causes her to follow up and check on me and now I am disheveled and off...

That all that you ever wanted, everything you cared about, was a joke, a sham, nothing more than a mirage and all the time and energy you spent dreaming and believing were nothing more than make believe things, fantasies, that never had a chance to come true. And as you stand there...

So my ex texted me the other day and said she had a dream about me. This from a woman who completely stopped talking to me and her last communication with me was a terse "Time to move on". We texted and instant messaged quit a bit that day and she said simply, "she wanted to talk to me". I told...

Two days ago I woke up at 5 am to a text message from my ex stating "I had a dream about you". It was sent at 1 am that morning and I slept through it which was fine but this was from a woman who had not talked to me in a month. I texted her back and last night we texted until after midnight...

I started a new job in August. It wasn't my first choice but I digress (another post for another time). One of my new co workers is a woman the same age as me, a very attractive 41 year old and for what ever reason we have become fast friends. Today, we were talking about life and I said...

As some of you may have noticed, I post on this website regularly. My posts aren't great or anything, but I am thankful to have a place to share my feelings in a private though very public way. I doubt I will ever meet anyone on this site and that isn't a bad thing but my point is, I have a...

This will be a semi long post. First off, I really like music. I can't play a lick of it, but I have to have music on as much as possible. I am one of those people who thinks, if my life was a movie, this is the song I want played at this point or that point. I used to have a song list called...

Today was not so bad. Today, for whatever reason, I realized my relationship with my ex was doomed from the start for so many reasons. We just had too many barriers between us and it is so hard to overcome the frowning eyes of society at large. Tomorrow could be totally different and I could be...

Today for whatever reason, was not a fun day. I didn't feel it. At work, at home, anywhere. All I could think about was her, and how I didn't matter to her anymore. My life is not bad, but it isn't what I wanted and I hate that I can't make my life more meaningful to me. I don't want to survive...

I understand I am nothing If I go away who Will notice For how long My mother will weep If I pass away What is my legacy What is my marker The thing that makes me matter Maybe I am not that important Like a whisper Like the wind I pass And disappear Maybe my life Was never meant To matter To...

I am not alone, but I am lonely. I have plenty of friends, people with whom I can hang out at any time and a family that cares about me. But right now, I am lonely. I miss one person, one special person, and she is all I can think about. How can I be so lucky in so many ways and feel cursed? My...

It happens so suddenly, a thought, mostly a song, is heard, and my mind is awash in memories of her and all these thoughts crash around my head, spinning me to and fro, covering me, taking away my breath and leaving me exhausted. I never know when they will come, only that they will and for...

Because of the age difference, she and I went through great lengths to hide our relationship from our friends. There are very few pictures of us together. It is almost like we never existed. Yes, the memories are there, but there is no tangible proof she and I were together and that saddens me...

When my young ex and I started dating, I was the one who was concerned about how my friends would perceive me dating someone who was young enough to be my daughter. She was constantly texting, calling and checking on me and so desired my attention, even if I wasn't as receptive. As our...