Killer of Henry Kissinger
- Apr 23, 2023
- Reaction score
In less than a day this thread took a 180 degree turn and went from melancholic to actually uplifting. Amazing!
So, that's my bullsh*t talk. But, beyond the bullsh*t. I think a lot of us are afraid. So we come up with excuses, reasons, and rationalizations to not face those fears.
It goes without saying that in the western world dating is virtually unavailable to sub 5 men. I will make the concession that average men are the only group which self improvement may slightly help their chances with women though. Attractive men don't need to self improve to attract women and no amount of self improvement is going to make a short, ugly man attractive.No! The below average man only!
I agree but can someone actually choose what they feel uplifted by? What some people may consider as successful copes, other consider as empty & counterproductive. The issue seems to be when one is unable to experience conditions in which their needs are met and are also unable find adequate copes to distract them from what their lives lack.I don't either, but do let me tell you a secret, sub5male, it's not things that are in themselves uplifting, it's you who feels uplifted by them or not.
heightfidence and/or faceinality wins the day. I don't know about you, but I learned two new words today! This'll really help my intellignorance.If you people would put even half as much effort into actually doing something as you put into making excuses, you might get somewhere.....
I'm maybe a four, lower five bar, extremely picky.It goes without saying that in the western world dating is virtually unavailable to sub 5 men.
I agree but can someone actually choose what they feel uplifted by? What some people may consider as successful copes, other consider as empty & counterproductive. The issue seems to be when one is unable to experience conditions in which their needs are met and are also unable find adequate copes to distract them from what their lives lack.
Completely get your point and I respect it.Really? I don't consider drinking and having to pay for sex as being uplifting-they are certinly not useful copes for everyone,
My views are based on my own experiences along with speaking to other men, many other men in fact, in similar circumstances. The claims of average at best men scoring with women well above their looks level are as old as the internet itself. I don't doubt that it is possible in ideal circumstances but is far, far rarer than you make it out to be.I'm maybe a four, lower five bar, extremely picky.
For several months now, I've been talking with someone who's at least a 7. Add in her personality, in my book, she's closer to 9 3/4.
I'm not an isolated case either. Your views are skewed.
I agree again and that has been my own experience as well. My lack of success with women lead me to study such things as stoicism and buddhism but I have found no relief in anything to date. It is certainly difficult if not impossible to find contentment when your fundamental needs are not being met, at least it has been so for me.As a matter of fact, what we feel uplifted by is not a constant throughout our lives. It's a basic reality of life. We are always changing, and change, broadly speaking, is in the nature of the universe. The phenomenon of consciousness wouldn't be possible if the universe were static. So, yes, what you feel uplifted by can be changed by your own actions in the longer or shorter span of your lifetime. To cite an example, the Stoics (and Nietzsche, for that matter), believed that our ideal of happiness should come from the realization of amor fati. Similarly, Epicureans would say that happiness comes from the realization of the truth regarding the nature of different types of pleasure, and the subsequent application of an ethics derived from the knowledge of this truth and so forth.
I think coping and accepting fate can often be synonymous. I did not consider what you said as in any way complaining and it is good that you were able to find outlets for your frustration.Completely get your point and I respect it.
But there is a little more to it than that.
- had two great meals out
- met friends and had a fun time
- enjoyed the day outside, both days had a nice cool breeze.
- I admitted more than once that I could not be happy with a woman anywhere near my own age, and would simply end up making both of us miserable, so paying for sex is really best for me now. So not a cope as much as accepting fate.
Yes, when I was younger, in my 20s or 30s, I suppose doing this was a cope. But now, it's just my life. When I complain here it's more about what mght have been or should have been, not about what is presently.
I'll try not to complain so much going forward.
Of course they do-it's a well know fact that a man's confidence is based on his height & his personality is the result of his facial quality. That is why so many good looking men can be jerks and still be looked at as good people while so many ugly men are considered as creepy stalkers regardless of their postitive non-physical attributes.heightfidence and/or faceinality wins the day. I don't know about you, but I learned two new words today! This'll really help my intellignorance.
I think coping and accepting fate can often be synonymous. I did not consider what you said as in any way complaining and it is good that you were able to find outlets for your frustration.
I think my own circumstance would likely be better if I were extraverted and had more mainstream interests but neither is the case. Along with my sub par physical appearance, these personality traits are the root causes of my very long term singledom.